in need of some suggestions

[deltaphi94]

I moved a little over a year ago, and I've been an at home mom ever since. So far, I know about 3 people I'm not related to, and I know absolutely no one even remotely close to my own age.

My son is in preschool, but that doesn't even give me time for a part time job. Once you consider the cost of day care, it isn't really worth it.

I found a church several months ago, and I thought that would also help with my hermit situation. Sure, I met new people, and I even found some cousins I never knew. That was really cool, but on the down side, even the cousin closest to my age is close to 20 years older than me.

Now, I've developed a theory that the members of my community have to be either 18 and under or 40 +. So, I came up with a new approach. Alumane chapter involvement. So, I go to the web site to find a chapter anywhere near me. There are 2, but from what I could gather, they were both close to an hour away. Not good.

So, I try for months to get in touch with both chapters. I finally do, and it turns out that one is much closer than I originally thought.

So, I tell the contact person that I am extremely interested, and wait to hear something about meetings. Months go by, and I hear nothing. It seems I am back at square one.

Sorry for the long post, but I need some ideas. I'm tired of being a hermit! Please share.

Thanks for reading!

Love in Our Bond,
Lori

[ladybug1116]

Lori--
I don't know how much these ideas will help, but anyway..here I go....
Have you thought about joining a local gym (maybe even one that's all female if there is one in your area)? You might meet some people in an aerobics class, but I don't know how friendly and open your town is. Even so, it will be something to do while your son is at preschool and it can help you feel better about yourself (and you'll look even better too )

Maybe there are places around town that need volunteers. Again, something you can do while your son is in preschool. You will meet lots of people this way and you are bound to find a few that you really click with.

And my last suggestion...I don't know the format of your son's preschool, but maybe they could use some help too. You know how there are always "class moms"? Maybe you can see what you can do to help the teacher. Additionally, you can see who your son's closest "friends" are and invite them and their moms over one afternoon for a play date. This will give you people that are probably somewhat close to your age to spend time with, as well as helping your son build relationships outside of the classroom.

I hope this helps and that your situation gets better By the way, what part of the country are you in?

Melissa

[deltaphi94]

Melissa~

Thanks for the ideas. I've tried a couple of them...

The school does have class moms, and I jumped on that chance. So, I wait patiently to see my turn come up. Still waiting, but I have had a chance to help with a couple of the parties. I don't want to sound evil or anything, but I'm thinking that my son is 3, and most of the people I know who have young kids are fairly close to my age. I get this call in Oct. to help with the fall party, and I find out the room mother is an at home mom. Finally I have something in common with a new person, and my social circle has expanded by 1. WOOOHOOO! On top of that, her husband works at the same place as mine. (I'm getting excited because I'm thinking she might be over 18 and under 45.) Then, she says, 'how old are you? you sound really young.' OK, so I'm 26. She's 40 something. Not that this is a bad thing, but I started looking into it, and I am like the youngest of all the mothers. By a lot.

Well, the room mother and I hit it off, and we make plans to go out together so she can show me the area. This solves a couple problems. Both of us need time out of the house and something that resembles a social life. Unfortunately, we have yet to get together outside of school functions.

In the process, we come up with a few other at home moms. A play group is a wonderful idea, and she and I agree it should be something we try to form with some of the others. It's looking like we're the only 2, so nothing has materialized.

I am looking into volunteer opportunities, and I've even told everyone I know who is involved with something like that that I would be more than willing to help. My church does a lot of things to help in the community, and one of my cousins heads up most of it, but never even thought that I might want to help.

You know what really gets me, though? My husband is quite a bit older than me, and most of his family treats me like I'm a mid-life crisis. I'll grant that we are not exactly the ideal conventional couple, but sometimes it seems like they enjoy watching me squirm as they talk about things that happened way back when.

I'm sure it will get better, but I'm just really tired of feeling like I live in a bubble.

Thanks!
Lori

BTW... I'm in sw Ohio