Do you think you could?

[DrPhil]

Widower forges friendship with man in crash that killed wife, unborn baby

http://www.today.com/news/man-crash-...wer-2D12044681

GCers, do you think you could do this?

What are some other things you've seen other people overcome or do that you believe you could or could not do?

[StealthMode]

Nope. I have been able to forgive certain things others have said they wouldn't but I think that (while such a beautiful portrayal of forgiveness and grace) goes beyond my capabilities.

ETA: There are a lot of factors at play in this particular story. The man who caused the crash is a fire fighter coming off a 24-hour shift and the widower is a pastor (who is more likely to be more forgiving than the average person). That makes the story a little less incredible. Even though I tend to be the one who tries to see the other side and feels empathy for "the other party" as well as the identified victim, I stand by my original statement. I just don't think I could realistically have the same attitude after losing my little family.

[*winter*]

After many years, I may be able to forgive the person. But I'd never be his friend!

[DubaiSis]

That's the premise of a movie I saw a couple years ago. I can't remember the name of it but girl with all kinds of promise gets drunk and kills a wife and baby on the same night that a planet is discovered to have human forms. Turns out it's a parallel universe except at the point of knowing the other existed their histories diverged. Or in other words while everything up to that point was the same on both planets, the point of knowledge (her hearing about it on the radio and looking up at the sky, thus causing the accident) breaks the history. And the wife and child are not dead on the other planet. I thought it was a little artsy fartsy, even for me, but the whole thing about her pretty much stalking the guy, becoming his cleaning lady and becoming friends is kind of interesting to contemplate. The problem is it was all just a little too obvious.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by StealthMode

That makes the story a little less incredible.

I don't think so. I feel no compassion for someone who falls asleep behind the wheel after a 24 hour workday. And for every pastor who preaches the spirit of forgiveness, there are 1,000,000,000 pastors preaching hellfire and damnation for behaviors deemed sinful.

[WestcoastWonder]

I agree with *winter*. At some point, I would forgive him, but I just don't think I could ever befriend somebody who did that. I just couldn't be around them without thinking about the fact that they killed my loved one(s).

But more power to him.

[ComradesTrue]

Here is another story where a mom reached out to the drunk/impaired driver who killed her adult son. They are now friends, and work in a non-profit together raising awareness that 1 in 3 of us are impacted by the actions of drunk driving.

Tiki and Latisha

I think that I could one day forgive, but reaching out to the individual is a whole other level that I suspect I wouldn't be capable of doing.