Depledge and ReRush HELP

jessie94 · #1 11-21-2012, 09:52 PM

Hi!
I rushed at my school (a big SEC university) this fall and got a bid from my favorite sorority, which obviously I was thrilled about. However, the weekend after our bid distribution, my family ran into a major unforeseen financial crisis and I felt obligated to depledge, since sorority dues are so high and I was already having problems figuring out how I was going to pay. I depledged officially about a week and a half after bids. I hate that I had to drop and am considering rushing again as a sophomore, but I wanted to know if there was zero chance I would be bidded into the same sorority. I loved it to death and miss it awfully but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, right? There were a few other sororities that I liked a lot, but my original bid was absolutely where I felt most at home, and I would completely understand but be more than a little disappointed if there was absolutely no way they would have me back. Thanks for any input!

ree-Xi · #2 11-21-2012, 10:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jessie94

Hi!
I rushed at my school (a big SEC university) this fall and got a bid from my favorite sorority, which obviously I was thrilled about. However, the weekend after our bid distribution, my family ran into a major unforeseen financial crisis and I felt obligated to depledge, since sorority dues are so high and I was already having problems figuring out how I was going to pay. I depledged officially about a week and a half after bids. I hate that I had to drop and am considering rushing again as a sophomore, but I wanted to know if there was zero chance I would be bidded into the same sorority. I loved it to death and miss it awfully but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, right? There were a few other sororities that I liked a lot, but my original bid was absolutely where I felt most at home, and I would completely understand but be more than a little disappointed if there was absolutely no way they would have me back. Thanks for any input!

Have you tried asking them? We have absolutely no way of being able answer to that question.

honeychile · #3 11-21-2012, 11:23 PM

Definitely talk to your former officers, and see what they'd say. Be specific that it won't happen again, that something came up that caught your family unawares, and that you're better prepared.

And when you rush again, be sure to give every GLO a chance! As much as you like XYZ, having a back up plan wouldn't hurt. Best of luck to you!

AZTheta · #4 11-21-2012, 11:41 PM

Question: the bid is good for a year, correct? So if the OP is so in love with her chapter, is it possible for her to "rejoin" within the year time period?

Of course I know there are 6,000,000,000 variables and special circumstances because it is a BIG SEC school. I'm asking, because if it is true, then couldn't the OP simply approach the sorority and have this discussion?

Okay guys, what am I missing here?

HQWest · #5 11-21-2012, 11:47 PM

Some sororities would or can allow her to repledge, but maybe not if they are very competitive? It sounds like she would rather not talk about what led to her having to withdraw or that she wants a do-over not (possibly joining another group)?
The trouble is that a lot of groups - without knowing for sure 100% that it won't happen again, might not be able to take a chance on her.

AZTheta · #6 11-22-2012, 12:36 AM

OK, educate me, please: I thought that it was an NPC MOI/ agreement (not sure that's the right term). And, HQWest, are you suggesting that NPC may permit it but an individual GLO may not? That would make sense to me.

I re-read her original post and I thought she wanted to rejoin the same chapter. *insert crossed eyes/confused face smiley here*

(not being argumentative, written language tone is not coming across well, it's pre-Thanksgiving madness and Mercury is still in retrograde; I really don't know the answer and would like to be informed).

HQWest · #7 11-22-2012, 12:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AzTheta

OK, educate me, please: I thought that it was an NPC MOI/ agreement (not sure that's the right term). And, HQWest, are you suggesting that NPC may permit it but an individual GLO may not? That would make sense to me.

I re-read her original post and I thought she wanted to rejoin the same chapter. *insert crossed eyes/confused face smiley here*

(not being argumentative, written language tone is not coming across well, it's pre-Thanksgiving madness and Mercury is still in retrograde; I really don't know the answer and would like to be informed).

Yes - I was suggesting that although her previous chapter could take her back - they may not be willing or able to. (For example, if it would mean she would be a pledge class of one in spring?) I also was not clear for some reason from her post that going back to her original choice now was what she wanted? or maybe it's that she couldn't go back in spring but would have the money in fall? Or a lot of places have a ver different experience if they have a big fall pledge class and a small COB class - there may be a reason she wants to be in a fall class?

AZTheta · #8 11-22-2012, 12:49 AM

Gotcha! THANKS! 'preciate it. You think of things I didn't even consider.

thetalady · #9 11-22-2012, 02:02 AM

A lot of the answer will depend on how you handled depledging. Did you behave respecfully and explain what happened to the officers that needed to know? Were you in good financial standing, although after less than 2 weeks I hope there wasn't much of a financial obligation already.

It is a shame that you had to depledge after receiving a bid from your top choice. If you want to rejoin your prior organization or pledge another, then you need to be 100%, without question, financially prepared to meet your commitment this time. Be sure to have a plan in place and be prepared to explain how you will meet your obligations this time.

Your bid is good for 1 year, although they have no obligation to take you back after you depledged. Since you felt that this GLO was truly your home, I would go back to them ASAP and explain that your situation has been straightened out. I would NOT wait for next fall rush, when you would have to compete with hundreds of bright, shiny freshmen. Don't take the chance. Going back to your original organization is probably your best hope of being Greek.

Consider yourself blessed if you get a 2nd chance...

greekdee · #10 11-22-2012, 04:22 AM

You've been given good advice and I agree. It sounds like you miss your sorority and would prefer to rejoin them over others. Begin by speaking with the executive officers. When you depledged, was it made clear to them that it was due to your family's unexpected financial crisis? That is different than dropping because you don't think you fit in, would be happier elsewhere, etc.

Honestly, at an SEC school, rerushing as a sophomore who depledged another sorority on the same campus is going to be a rough road. As thetalady said, going back to your original sorority is probably your best hope. I would speak to the officers now instead of later. All the best to you!

AOII Angel · #11 11-22-2012, 10:59 AM

Number one question, and the one that will likely be asked by the sorority...What has changed for you financially? How will you be able to pay your dues all four years? The chapter will want to know that giving you a chance doesn't mean that they will be taking on a financial risk. If you can't answer those questions satisfactoralily, I wouldn't bother. You burned them with the financial angle. If you go back, you have to go back on strong financial footing.

33girl · #12 11-22-2012, 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

Number one question, and the one that will likely be asked by the sorority...What has changed for you financially? How will you be able to pay your dues all four years? The chapter will want to know that giving you a chance doesn't mean that they will be taking on a financial risk. If you can't answer those questions satisfactoralily, I wouldn't bother. You burned them with the financial angle. If you go back, you have to go back on strong financial footing.

This is what I was wondering. Even if it was a one-time thing (for example, both your family's cars blew up at the same time and they had to get 2 new ones), there are usually repercussions that last over a period of years. Did you inquire about payment plans? Did anyone suggest that option to you when you said you were dropping?

Oh and also...Were you CLEAR that your decision was financially motivated only? Because if you weren't, I wouldn't bother trying to repledge even if someone dumped 80 pounds of money on your doorstep.

AnchorAlumna · #13 11-22-2012, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by greekdee

Honestly, at an SEC school, rerushing as a sophomore who depledged another sorority on the same campus is going to be a rough road.

Not necessarily.
At Alabama, I saw a number of re-rushing sophomores and at least 1 junior who had successful recruitments. Probably because, during the year, they meet and became friends with a number of sorority women. And the upperclassman quote helped, too.

Of course, I saw a number of re-rushing sophomores and juniors whose outcome was not successful.

jessie94 · #14 11-22-2012, 03:41 PM

Thanks to all of you for the input- I have a much clearer idea now of the options I can follow. The officers knew it was purely financial, and how upset I was that I had to drop. I guess to clarify, in that week I had a family member be diagnosed with a serious illness, and we found out she couldn't pay her own medical bills and would need a lot of treatment, so my parents decided to help take on that burden and I offered the funds that my parents had put aside tentatively for my dues to help out (that was only a tiny fraction, but I felt like I needed to give something up like the rest of my family). I was still going to join and just figure something out in order to pay. Then my dad lost his job and my parents sort of panicked, and I knew they were looking at this as something extra and it was stressing them out hugely, plus we didn't know when he would be able to find a new job, so I just told them to forget about it so it was one less thing for them to be concerned over. It was just a bad confluence of circumstances. Luckily my dad found a job within the next month, and well paying one, so everything is stable again, but my family is VERY fiscally conservative and it was simply the right thing to do at the time. I will talk to the execs about my choices, just so I know, but I really appreciate y'all's comments. I don't know much about Panhellenic guidelines, so I am glad to know what's appropriate and at least sort of what to expect. I'm going to assume it won't work out but give it a shot regardless, and trust that whatever happens is what was meant to be

. I will likely re-rush again next year if I don't work out anything with the execs, or if that is what they suggest.

33girl · #15 11-23-2012, 12:06 AM

When it rains it pours, doesn't it? *hug*

All I can say is, keep in touch with the sorority members and let them know you still want to be a part of the group if it is at all financially feasible. The fact that you were caring and responsible enough to depledge quickly once you knew you couldn't afford it goes a long way. Not everyone shows that level of consideration.