Time Cover

[amanda6035]

Heli-moms, is this you?

[33girl]

I was wondering when this would make its way here.

IMO, any mom who believes they are doing the best thing for their child with "attachment parenting" would not exploit their child or themselves in such a gauche way.

[KSUViolet06]

Do not get me started on attachment parenting or the AP crazies I met in my preschool work days.

The prevailing wisdom is that if you don't breastfeed Bobby til age 3 or co-sleep until like kindergarten, he will grow up to hotwire cars and be a delinquent.

Breastfeeding is great and there is nothing wrong with letting your kids sleep with you every now and then, but the judgement that comes out of AP and Dr. Sears fanaticism is ridiculous. Like, I've seen women say that they actually don't breastfeed or that their 18 month old sleeps in his own room full time and have other women look at them like they just said "I plan to barbecue him once we get him fat enough."

[dekeguy]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

... have other women look at them like they just said "I plan to barbecue him once we get him fat enough."

======================================

I have heard of 'roast kid' but that seems a bit extreme.

[Sciencewoman]

Well, at least she's keeping her figure trim by maintaining her high metabolism due to continued breastfeeding.

[DZTurtle11]

I find this whole thing disturbing. I know that since I'm not a parent I can't totally understand, but there is something odd about women who do this at such a late age. I keep wondering what types of issues he'll have when he gets older. Maybe he won't have any issues, but there seems to be a reason why the majority of women stop breast feeding after a certain age/period.

Even if this is healthy, is it really appropriate to put it on a magazine cover like this? Is nothing private anymore? I get it's natural, but so is going to the bathroom and I hope that isn't on the cover next week. It's all just bad taste.

[thetalady]

I have never had kids, so I might not have a full comprehension of this whole thing. My opinion, though, is that when the kid is old enough that he asks for a sandwich with his "milk", time to stop the breast feeding!

Magazine cover totally exploiting the situation and unneccessary.

[DubaiSis]

I think the whole breastfeeding thing is such a bizarrely hot button issue. My sister-in-law couldn't breast feed because it just simply wasn't working. Having a new born losing weight is just not a good idea, so she had to stop. And the "planning to barbecue her thing" was what she got a lot of because she preferred to have a healthy child instead of an attached at the nipple one. If you can breast feed for a year, that's great, but once the kid can walk up to you to ask for it, nuh uh.

And sleeping in Mom and Dad's bed occasionally can be a treat for everyone, but a child should have their own space from day 1. Of course, how are you ever going to be a successful heli-parent if you let your child out of your reach for 8 hours a night? Maybe it's being 1 of 5 kids, but we just couldn't do it and I do think the independence we were given from birth probably lead the way to us being independent adults who don't have milk obsessions. I've known at least one adult who had an unhealthy attachment to milk. I would love to know if he was breast fed and for how long.

[KSUViolet06]

There was a GCer (I forget who) who posted about getting a similar reaction after having to stop breastfeeding early due to a cancer scare. That's appalling.

I do have a couple friends who are parents and they accuse Time of perpetuating "mompetition" with the headline.

[Greek_or_Geek?]

I find it hard to believe that a mother who "cares" so much about her child to continue to breast feed them so long thinks nothing of exploiting them by putting them on the cover of a magazine like this. The kid's going to grow up. Google is forever. He's not going to think this is cute in a few years.

[VandalSquirrel]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

I think the whole breastfeeding thing is such a bizarrely hot button issue. My sister-in-law couldn't breast feed because it just simply wasn't working. Having a new born losing weight is just not a good idea, so she had to stop. And the "planning to barbecue her thing" was what she got a lot of because she preferred to have a healthy child instead of an attached at the nipple one. If you can breast feed for a year, that's great, but once the kid can walk up to you to ask for it, nuh uh.

And sleeping in Mom and Dad's bed occasionally can be a treat for everyone, but a child should have their own space from day 1. Of course, how are you ever going to be a successful heli-parent if you let your child out of your reach for 8 hours a night? Maybe it's being 1 of 5 kids, but we just couldn't do it and I do think the independence we were given from birth probably lead the way to us being independent adults who don't have milk obsessions. I've known at least one adult who had an unhealthy attachment to milk. I would love to know if he was breast fed and for how long.

If I ever have a child I may not breastfeed since a medicine I take regularly to help me enjoy a fully functioning life is passed through breast milk. I could stop taking it while pregnant since my body will probably be out of whack anyway, but with an infant now in my life functioning at the highest level possible would best for everyone.

I also can't imagine having a child in my bed with my partner and actually getting rest. I have severe sleep problems and not being rested already negatively affects me, can't imagine what would happen if a baby was added in and a dude who snores. If I was breastfeeding I might add one of those beds to the side so baby is nearby, put the crib in the bedroom, but I'd have no problem taking turns with my future baby's daddy with who is on night duty and sleeping in a separate room from the precious darling so at least someone isn't sleep deprived.

My nephew will be six this summer and he is still not sleeping alone the majority of the time, I don't know why my sister hasn't gone on a murderous rampage yet.

[Always AlphaGam]

If moms want to breastfeed for as long as they want and if the child wants it, then that's up to them. I nursed my daughter until 3 months, and that's when my supply couldn't keep up to her needs. I was sad because I loved the time she and I shared while she nursed. It's an experience that I can't put into words. I think that that's why moms want to continue breastfeeding for as long as possible. If my milk hadn't run out I'm not sure what I would have done, but I lean more toward the "if she can ask for solid food..." side. I don't know, maybe she would have weaned herself off when she was ready. I like to think that that's what the majority of kids do - wean when they're ready.

I'm not so much disgusted at the idea of breastfeeding past a certain age -- to each, her own. What irritates the shit out of me is that cover and that question of ARE YOU MOM ENOUGH? Freaking A. Moms who don't breastfeed/breastfeed past a certain age are no less of a mother than those who do. And that kid? He must be at least 5. When kids are old enough to have memories of feeding from the tit, you probably shoulda quit a year ago.

My daughter likes to nap on my bed during the day but has slept in her own bed nightly since Day 1, with the exception of the first time she got sick. Both I and her father are deep sleepers, so bedsharing was never an option. We've chosen to co-sleep (have her crib in our room) until she is 6 months old. Earlier when she'd wake up for feedings 2-3 times a night I just picked her up and fed her in the living room, in her reclinalounger. Now that she's sleeping through the night, her sharing a room with us hasn't been a problem.

My stepson's been a bed-sharer with his mom since birth and now that he's almost 7, it's been a pain in the ass to get him to stay in his room and sleep in his bed. This is why I knew I had to get my daughter used to sleeping in her own bed.

I hate it when people tell me how to parent my child so I try not to do the same to others. So far my baby is healthy and happy so I must be doing something right...even if it's not what Sears says. They can all go to hell.

[Oh, and KSU I think it was SWTXBelle you were talking about. Damn those LaLeakys]

[chi-o_cat]

Originally Posted by Greek_or_Geek?

I find it hard to believe that a mother who "cares" so much about her child to continue to breast feed them so long thinks nothing of exploiting them by putting them on the cover of a magazine like this. The kid's going to grow up. Google is forever. He's not going to think this is cute in a few years.

This times 100!

[MaggieXi]

A child who is thriving and is happy is what is important. There needs trump the needs of moms to engage in "mompetition". This story was only covered by TIME for sales reasons.

I had planned on breastfeeding for 6 months. I ended up only doing 3 because my daughter was not gaining enough and had severe reflux. More than one pediatrician said she would be better off on formula. After the switch, my daughter was happy and you could see the developmental change in her within 2 weeks. When I tell moms who breastfeed that, they freak out and say doctors would never say that "breast is best".

My daughter spent several days in the NICU after she was born, the nurses there said do not allow this baby to sleep in the same bed with us once we got her home. She was already used to sleeping away from me. She has been in her crib since day 1 for bedtime (that doesn't mean I didn't sleep in the chair in her room for the first few days), and she has always been an incredibly good sleeper and was sleeping 7-8 hours straight at 4 months.

(a side note: I was listening to coverage of this story on my way to work this morning, a report said mom is a former play mate and stated that she was breastfed until she was 6).

[Munchkin03]

Even though I don't even have kids yet, I've been sanctimommied by AP women with whom I work. For them, it's gone beyond "mompetition" and is just another way to cause schisms between women. In a male-dominated field that's kind of effed up.

My mom was always really adamant with my sister about letting my niece and nephew sleep with her as a matter of principle...it's not just about the kid it's about your marriage/partnership! There are kid zones and there are adult zones...

Also, I don't think that 20 years is long enough to call oneself a "parenting expert," the way that Dr. Sears and some of his most loyal acolytes have.