Thanksgiving with the Family?

[honeychile]

Okay, I need some honest opinions.

A lot of y'all know what's been up with my life - I usually live alone, but when my mother had 2 heart attacks & 4 surgeries almost two years ago, I thought I'd stay with her for a couple nights to get her back on her feet. I'm still here - I've spent exactly 12 nights in my own house in 22 months!

Prior to this, my brother & sister-in-law would never come to family Easter dinners at my house because she wanted to ride and they're not big on Easter. I accepted that. Last month, I made dinner for my mother's birthday, and purposely made pot roast as my sister-in-law has always liked it - but then she brought her own meat! Most of my relatives are surprised that I'm still speaking to her!

They usually host Thanksgiving, which is out on their farm, and not served until late, again, so she can ride. I end up holding my mother's little Bichon so their Dobermans don't harrass him too much. It's a frazzling affair, and I've tried to get out of it for years.

When I heard that someone was coming to whom I'm not even speaking, I lost it today, and said that's it, I'll drive my mother out there, but won't be there. And now I'm the "bad guy"!

Am I so wrong? Is it so terrible to want to be alone, for even one lousy day? Or should I suck it up and realize that I might not have a family someday, and will regret missing it?