Black Balling someone because you don't like them

[Reds695]

Would you not accept someone into your organization, just because you did not like them or you had a personal problem with them?
Be honest!

[carnation]

It would depend on why I didn't like them. If they had a bad reputation or talked about people behind their backs all the time or I felt they would somehow damage my sorority's reputation, then yes--I would vote them down.

If it were just some personal thing and I felt that they would be an asset to our group regardless, then I wouldn't vote against them.

[mgdzkm433]

Like carnation said, If I didn't like someone based on something that would affect the sorority--not me, but the sorority itself, then I wouldn't vote for them.

If say I didn't like their personality or they just rub me the wrong way, but they would be an asset to the sorority, they have good grades, they show an undying intrest in what we stand for, then I would vote for them.

You don't have to be friends with all your sisters, but when the doors close and the meetings begin--nothing is personal, it's all about what's best for the sorority.

[This message has been edited by mgdzkm433 (edited November 06, 2000).]

[gibbonsgal]

Originally posted by Reds695:
Would you not accept someone into your organization, just because you did not like them or you had a personal problem with them?
Be honest!

I'm starting to think I may have a problem with this during this coming Spring's Formal Rush. As a new member this semester I just don't know how heavily my opinion weighs when it comes to the rushees that I really don't like. I can think of one girl, who I was close with at one point, and her possibly rushing bc she likes my sorority's philanthropy. She badmothed me A LOT and over all I just really dislike her. What is the best thing to do and how do I voice my concerns as a new member diplomatically?

[misssgrho]

No I wouldn't. It is our duty as members of our organization to pick people who would be great assets to our organization. We cannot allow ourselves to passs over dynamic people who would do great things for our organizations because of petty personal problems. No I would not black ball a person because of personal problems. I love my sorority much more than that.

[mccoyred]

I believe that when it comes time to vote, if you have a problem with an applicant, you should state your problem as objectively as possible and relate all the FACTS, not personal opinions. Then let the group as a whole decide. Who knows, there may be FACTS of which you are not aware that may change your opinion of the applicant.

Regardless of whether you change your mind, the wisdom of the group supercedes a PERSONAL opinion. I agree with the previous posts--you don't have to like or be best friends with all your sisters but when it comes time to take care of business, personal feelings must take a back seat. Now if there is an opinion that the applicant CANNOT put aside personal dislikes, then THAT is an issue that needs to be further explored in the name of sisterhood.

just 2 cents from an oldhead

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mccoyred

Dynamic
Salient
Temperate

[Reds695]

Originally posted by CutiePie2000:

Please excuse my ignorance, but how exactly does blackballing work? If you get 80 white balls in your favor and just 1 black ball, is that "it", game over, no bid for you? Or is it more of a majority thing...more white balls than black balls means you are "in"? Please explain & thank you.

Its a little different with BGLO's. SOrry I couldn't help

[Zetaphied]

Hi everyone,

I am new to greek chat so I just wanted to say hello to all my fellow greeks NPHC and NPC!

Alright,now to the question at hand, if I had a personal problem with someone, unless it was something about them that would make my organization look bad, or didn't coincide with our principles than I wouldn't just vote against them out of spite. If someone is about business and is going to come into my organization and put in some work than I would definitely want them in my organization and for business reasons I would just have to put our differences aside, or fix them. No matter how much you hate someone, if the rest of your Sorors/Frat thinks that they would make a quality member than you will be outvoted anyways LOL...it is up to you to act like an adult and find a way to work with that person. In the real world you may have supervisors and co-workers that you can't stand, but you still have to learn to deal.

[Trish]

It depends on why I don't like them. If it's a matter of style or taste or even personality I don't think its a good thing to outright ball someone. On the other hand, if here is a lot of negative behavior then balling may be warranted.

One thing I have learned through the sorority is that you don't have to agree with or even like everyone, it fact its sometimes preferrable. Sometimes your closest sisters become those who were not friends at the beginning. During college we all change and diversity is important to learn tolerance, acceptance, and real love. As I grow to love others I become a better person and sister. Sorority love is more about me loving others as they are and not necessairily getting others to conform to me.

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"It's a long long road, it's a big big world, we are wise wise women, we are giggling girls." ~Ani DiFranco~

[James]

Ok . . . this is always a tough one . . .

Question 1: No, if I personally disliked someone I would not vote no . . . unless there were a valid reason that would affect the chapter.

I use a mental trick when I am judging someone. If this person were my friend would I hire him for my company?

Because ultimately I am not interested in just buying friends, and I can still remain friends with someone that is not in my chapter. This approach gives me a different perspective.

Question 2: How many black balls does it take to eliminate a candidate?

This varies from National to National and sometimes from chapter to chapter according to by-laws.

However, a lot of times, at least in NIC Fraternities, it can be anywhere from 1-3 negative votes to eliminate someone. And it can be this small a number no matter how large the chapter is.

[33girl]

Just to clarify, no we don't use actual balls!

During rush we had a rating/voting system, you rated someone from 1-10 on personality, scholarship etc. if you just didn't like someone you could give them a low score.

But if someone has done you or those close to you serious harm in some way - just for an example - you could give them a "no" vote. The no vote is VERY serious. You don't use it for shallow or petty reasons. It's saying "no matter what the circumstances, I could never call this person sister." It takes 1-3 of these votes to eliminate a person for membership.