Is He Gay????

[DPhiU]

Ok, ladies, I need your help. First, I realize that this post has nothing to do with fraternity/sorority life, but I'm desperate for some unbiased opinions on this subject. I hope it is not deleted. Anyway, a few months ago, I met this guy at work (let's call him John) and we became friends. We sit together and go to lunch together every day. Now, when I first met him, my gaydar told me he was gay, but after a month or so, he told me he had a girlfriend. He also said that all his life, people, including his father, had thought that he was gay. In fact, even before we met and started hanging out, everyone at work thought he was gay. The only thing in my closet is a fabulous wardrobe. Everyone at work thinks that we are a couple and he does not dispute this to them.

He takes me home every friday nite and stays until 3am, although nothing has happened between us. He has slept over here numerous times, in the spare room. One time he told me that my a*s was flat, and I took his hand and put it on my a*s to prove him wrong. He didn't react negatively.

He broke up with his girlfriend after she demanded that he choose between her and his friendship with me.

His best friend is gay and he says that all his life, he's always had gay friends and they always fall in love with him. By the way, I'm falling in love with him!!! He hurt his shoulder working out and I massaged not only his neck/shoulders, but his whole back, during which he felt my "you know what" against his a*s. (I was sitting on his a*s). His only reaction was to say "I felt something sticking me. You're not getting turned on, are you?"

So, while my gaydar is 100% in tune, I'm beginning to get a little confused. On the phone he kinda treats me like we're at the very least, dating, but in person, acts like we're just friends.

So, to make a long story short (too late), HELP ME ladies. 1) Is he gay? 2) What should I do?. I really have strong feelings for this guy, but I'm not sure if I'm willing to wait for him to "find" himself. I would also appreciate the opinions of the open-minded, heterosexual males out there. Thanks.

[AKA2D '91]

It's been almost 3 years since you have posted...

I guess Welcome Back is in order.

[NOWorNEVER]

Yes. Yes he is very gay and just doesn't know it yet.

Are you a man or a woman?

[AKA2D '91]

Find the first post made...

[SKEEphistAKAte]

Originally posted by DPhiU
Now, when I first met him, my gaydar told me he was gay

That should have been the end of it.

[nachural]

I dont know one str8 man that would allow a gay man to sit on his a$$ and massage his back.


he's gay

[SkeeWee14]

Originally posted by DPhiU
So, to make a long story short (too late), HELP ME ladies. 1) Is he gay? 2) What should I do?. I really have strong feelings for this guy, but I'm not sure if I'm willing to wait for him to "find" himself. I would also appreciate the opinions of the open-minded, heterosexual males out there. Thanks.

Okay...If you even have to QUESTION a mans sexual preference, the only thing that YOU need to do is KEEP IT MOVIN'!!! Unless of coarse you don't mind risking your health/life over a piece of sexually confused d***. I'm sorry for being so blunt, but there are far too many people who are being deceived and end up dying from AIDS because they were with a man who was on the fence sexually. For you to have all the signs ahead of time you would be CRAZY to put yourself in that situation. Keep him as a friend, but it wouldn't be smart to become physically involved with him.

[ykimber]

Originally posted by SkeeWee14
Okay...If you even have to QUESTION a mans sexual preference, the only thing that YOU need to do is KEEP IT MOVIN'!!! Unless of coarse you don't mind risking your health/life over a piece of sexually confused d***. I'm sorry for being so blunt, but there are far too many people who are being deceived and end up dying from AIDS because they were with a man who was on the fence sexually. For you to have all the signs ahead of time you would be CRAZY to put yourself in that situation. Keep him as a friend, but it wouldn't be smart to become physically involved with him.

SkeeWee14, DphiU is a guy.

[SKEEphistAKAte]

Originally posted by ykimber
SkeeWee14, DphiU is a guy.

What in the...? But why is he...? Aw, nevermind!

[ladygreek]

It wasn't until the fourth paragraph that I realized that DPhiU was male. I had to go back and re-read it in that context.

DPhiU, you would know better than us if he is gay. My guess is yes, and he's playing games.

[OrangeMoon]

Yes, the man you are questioning is gay as the day is long.

[abaici]

Originally posted by ladygreek
It wasn't until the fourth paragraph that I realized that DPhiU was male. I had to go back and re-read it in that context.

Me too!

But, yes. He's gay.

[SKEEphistAKAte]

Originally posted by pearls
Hi Soror,

This is my response to: Is he gay? Well, it is good that he is not into rushing into a sexual relationship, but I would not take any chances on him. He seems suspect. He may not be gay, he may be bisexual. There are too many indications that he is in that lifestyle: gay friends, people thinking he is gay. The average man would be more tempted to engage in some type of sexual relationship unless he is religious. I believe that the average person would be tempted, especially these days. I would not take a chance on him. Trust me, there have been men who exhibit less effeminate characteristics who have turned out to be gay.
Try to get into someone else. Best wishes.

1. The person who posted this topic is NOT a soror.
2. Please introduce yourself to the board in the "New Sorors" thread at the top of this forum.

Thanx.

[pearls]

Oops,

Thanks, I mistakenly said soror with Aka on my mind. I tried to delete it, not successfully. Ok, I'll look into introducing myself. Glad to see someone is online at the same time.

[starang21]

ol boy is 'mo like sunshine.