Words Women Use

[Omicron]

FINE ~ This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.

FIVE MINUTES ~ This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so I feel that it's an even trade.

NOTHING ~ If you ask her what is wrong and she says NOTHING, this means something and you should be on your toes. NOTHING is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last FIVE MINUTES and end with the word FINE.

GO AHEAD (with raised eyebrows) ~ This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over NOTHING and will end with the word FINE.

GO AHEAD (normal eyebrows) ~ This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care." You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by NOTHING! and FINE and she will talk to you in about FIVE MINUTES when she cools off.

LOUD SIGH ~ This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal
statement very misunderstood by men. "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over NOTHING.

SOFT SIGH ~ Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.

THAT'S OKAY ~ This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for whatever it is that you have done.

"That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead." At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

PLEASE DO ~ This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay."

THANKS ~ A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say "you're welcome."

THANKS A LOT ~ This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you "Nothing."

Please send this out to ALL men that you know just to warn them about future arguments they can avoid if remembering all the terminology.

[James]

LOL . .. so true . . .

But what does:

Whatever mean? Especially when accompanied with raised eyebrows and a loud sigh?

And usually we hear Whatever AFTER the Fine that was supposed to end everything!!

[maggieaxid]

i think my favorite conversation is:

me: i'll be ready in five minutes.

him: but we needed to be there 5 minutes ago.

me: Well MAYBE if you would have told me that sooner, I would have been ready sooner....sigh out loud.

him: i'm just going to go without you. you can meet up with us there.

me: fine.

him: whats wrong?

me: nothing.

him: alright. im just going to go then. ok?

me: go ahead...(eyebrows raised.) thats fine. just leave your fiance to drive downtown by herself.

him: you''ll be fine. your a big girl.

me: fine. if i get mugged or something, that'll be okay, right?

him: do you want me to wait?

me: no, i'm ready now. Thanks!

[sigmagrrl]

Originally posted by James
LOL . .. so true . . .

But what does:

Whatever mean? Especially when accompanied with raised eyebrows and a loud sigh?

And usually we hear Whatever AFTER the Fine that was supposed to end everything!!

JUST so you know, you WON'T hear the whatever AFTER the Fine, if you DON'T OPEN YOUR YAP BACK UP!!!!!! That Whatever is actually our polite way of saying "Just SHUT UP cuz you've already screwed yourself!!"!!!!!!

I love being a woman!!!!!!!!!

[AGDLynn]

I usually say that when I am tired of arguing because I know that you won't accept the fact that YOU are the wrong one or you are going to do whatever you intended before the conversation was started!

[James]

MaggieAxid:

That was some funny stuff . . . I take it doesn't matter at all if he gave you all kinds of warning about the event?

That the warning is not more important than your bad hair day?

On a side note: I was an hour late to an old friends wedding ceremony because my date was having a bad hair day and my car was in the shop. I then had to leave the reception extremely early because she was uncomfortable. Talk about high maintainence!

sigmagrrl:

USUALLY the girl uses WHATEVAH after she has lost the argument and is fleeing the scene.

HOWEVER, the smart girl almost always wins by pulling a LOW BLOW. Namely, QUIVERING lower lip and TEARS, generally followed up with a wailing cry of "You just DON"T UNDERSTAND!"

Or, even worse. *sigh*

Some variation of, "You just don't LOVE ME! Because if you loved me you would . . . (insert some random words that mean: Be OBEDIENT TO MY WILL)."

WE boys are mostly helpless in the face of female tears. Damn . . . you might as well put a dress on us, sit us in the corner, and make us play with dolls!

Its just not right to unman us that way! *sigh*

However, I am giving you ladies FAIR WARNING, I have almost finished a video tape program (19.95 plus s/h) that will decondition a man to any woman's tears. Be it his mother, sister, female partner whatever!

Then where will y'all be? *evil cackle*

In one fell swoop you will lose your most potent weapon!

(If the women's secret police don't silence me first )

[KillarneyRose]

I use whatever after I already won my argument and am not really listening to what is being said but want to make some sort of reply.

I also use sure as a less enthusiastic form of yes. When I don't particularly want to do something but am going along with it to be nice.

Him: Did you still want to go to see that lastest chick flick?
Me: Yes
Him: Well why don't we do that tomorrow so we can
catch the football game today. Is that okay with you?
Me: Sure

[BearyCuteAPhi]

Hahahahaha!!!! I love this thread....it is soooo true. I should print thin out and give it to my boyfriend

ronnie

[poodleNtraining]

LMAO so true so true!!!! I'm famous for the "nothing", "fine" and "thats ok" . But "nothing" also means that"something" is up, and they want you to show concern. If she says "nothing" and you say ok and give up after one go round, you'll get the "loud sigh" LOL. ALWAYS ask at least three times in order to find out what "nothing" is.

maggieaxid, that was funny!!!

[sororitygirl2]

Originally posted by PoodleNTraining:

LMAO so true so true!!!! I'm famous for the "nothing", "fine" and "thats ok" . But "nothing" also means that"something" is up, and they want you to show concern. If she says "nothing" and you say ok and give up after one go round, you'll get the "loud sigh" LOL. ALWAYS ask at least three times in order to find out what "nothing" is.

See, I have to disagree on this one. When I say "nothing" is wrong, I mean it... and if someone keeps asking, that is when something begins to be a problem because I get annoyed.

I know we are rare, but there are a few girls out there who say exactly what they mean!

[James]

Awesome are you taken lol? Have any thin-good-looking-friends that are the same?

Originally posted by sororitygirl2
Originally posted by PoodleNTraining:



See, I have to disagree on this one. When I say "nothing" is wrong, I mean it... and if someone keeps asking, that is when something begins to be a problem because I get annoyed.

I know we are rare, but there are a few girls out there who say exactly what they mean!

[Optimist Prime]

see there is no cut and try with you women folk. At least be up front about the particular dialect of chick speak you're speaking and there will be less problems.

[texas*princess]

Originally posted by sigmagrrl


JUST so you know, you WON'T hear the whatever AFTER the Fine, if you DON'T OPEN YOUR YAP BACK UP!!!!!! That Whatever is actually our polite way of saying "Just SHUT UP cuz you've already screwed yourself!!"!!!!!!

I love being a woman!!!!!!!!!

Amen to that sigmagirl!