Boys Boys Boys

[ilovemyglo]

Okay, so here is the deal. hmm.. I broke up with my boyfriend before the break because he was being a big ole jerk (ask DIVA, she'll tell you!). But I really do love him. SO. since we have been broken up I have talked to a few guys. I actually think they are really sweet guys and they are really fun too! So, my ex and I still talk and he came up to see me. Then he calls and is so excited and SOO SWEET. His parents are in the middle of a divorce so I know that he is having a hard time. Then I find out he bought me a lavaliere. He is all ready to FINALLY make a commitment and now I just want to be single and play around. I really do love him and I have told myself that I will give it until the end of thebreak. Maybe I can get all my "FUN" out of the way or something. I don't know. I am young, I know. But what the hecK!!! Okay, so I wanted to see what you all thought. I love my ex and want things to work things out, but should I accept the lavaliere? I mean really. I dont know what to do.
Okay, thanks!!! Love you all. Even if I dont know about boys, cause I mean, in the end they are just guys! They arenot my sisters!

[AlphaGam1019]

Sarah, I think the question is-- what degree of jerk is your ex? What types of sins has he committed against you in the past? Did he change? etc, etc.

I do agree that a lavalier is a big step for any guy- but a good attitude must accompany it! If he is willing to change and not be a jerk anymore I think you should take the lavalier By the way...what fraternity?

[PKTSU01]

It doesn't really matter if he is ready for committment or not, because you sound like you aren't. Ya said yourself, you are young and want to have "FUN", and get it out of the way. You're going to want to do this anyways, either now, or after he lavaliers you, except after he does, it won't be nearly as easy to try and justify wanting to mess around. Unless you are serious, serious enough to sacrifice the "FUN" and messing around as if you were single, don't accept the lavaliere, because it seems as if you are doing so with reservations, and thats not fair to him or you. I remember someone telling me once, "you'll always want what you can't have." You need to decide if he means enough to you to come before any other potential guy, if not, you'll already know the action to take.

[squirrely girl]

sarah,

trust me when i say... be absolutely certain what you want. i got engaged in spring and it's been great for me. but i know that it's not for everybody, and i like PKTSU says, it's really hard to justify going out/messing around if you're suppossed to be committed. sometimes i think it would be kewl to head out to a club with the girls, but at the same time it's different now and would be kinda weird.

i'm also not saying your ex is like this, but sometimes when people realize what they had (once it's gone) they'll say and do a lot to get it back. even though he's saying he's ready to make a committment, you kinda need to ask yourself if he REALLY REALLY means it.

in the mean time, like you said, have fun over break and don't stress it. relationships aren't meant to be stressed over constantly.

happy new year!!!!
marissa

[winnieb]

Sarah--

Take your time and really think about what you want. Think about the reasons that caused you two to spilt---are they things that can be overlooked or things that will always haunt you???

How much "fun" do you want to have while you are still young??? Is it the type of fun you can have while you are comitted--and still look yourself in the mirror the next morning? If you are just looking to go out with the girls and have a fun evening out-even at a bar or a party--that can be done while you are still committed. If you are looking to "sew your oats" then maybe you are not ready to move to the next step. I can atest that it is possible to still go out with the girls, leave the guys at home and have fun--still be faithful and in love.

Is it possible that you guys could get back together without the laviering and what until the end of the semester for that--just to test the waters.

Sarah--just listening closely to emotions and follow your heart--it will not lead you astray.

Keep us posted!!

Loyally,
Wendi

[LeslieAGD]

Glad to hear I'm not the only one with boy trouble!!! After 4 near perfect months, out of nowhere, Chris and I are on the verge of break up.

Anyway...Sarah, I agree with everyone that you need to evaluate the entire situation. Don't just go back to him because it's convenient; you'll just end up breaking up again later if that is the case. Hope things work out!

[AlphaGamDiva]

fahey, my lil' mushroom head...nooooooo.

to all you ppl who don't know the situation, i'll give yu the abridged version.
this boy is a member of Farm House...sarah needs a preppy boy, not a tobacco spittin', tractor ridin', horse lovin red-neck. and not that there is anything wrong with those guys (i'm orig. from AL, so i know what's up ), but i mean, seriously folks. this guy is not especially nice to her, and says he changes, but is a lot like my own ex...just a pig. just tell her it's not a good idea, and all will be well in the world.

loyally,
monica
fahey...you know i love you, girl!!!!!!!!!!

[AlphaGam1019]

lol

[ilovemyglo]

Okay, so I searched through (YEAH SEARCH FEATURE!) because I remembered I had written a thread about boys already... so here is the new deal....
I am dating this guy since late July early August. We were friends when we met, but I mean.. oh GOD he is really awesome (one of those guys your mom refers to as a great catch!). So anyway, here is the deal with him. This is an excerpt from an email to AlphaGamDiva:
Anything in [] I added for you all!

I am still dating the south african, and actually it is going really really well. It is funny though cause Sunday he and I were talking and he said that he didn't want to see me anymore, and I was like, uhm- okay, why? And he said something stupid and I said well if that is how you feel and he goes into how no that isn't how he feels, he feels really weird and he doesn't understand what is going on. So of course I am thinking you freak! So I didn't talk to him all Sunday and I was really upset, [I don't think I realized how into this guy I was until he said that!] but luckily Luckett [One of my best friends of like 4 years!] was in town and he was having problems with his girl so we hung out and talked about our dating dilemmas (his girlfriend loves her ex, my guy is really commitment phobic!) so we had a beer and played pool up the street from my house. YEAH!
So Monday I call Konrad (check this- his full name is Konrad [edited to protect the innocent]) and he and I talked for two hours. He told me that he goes into these phases where he questions everything in his life, which I totally understand, cause who doesn't, you know? So then we get to talking about why me and Chris broke up [the guy that I was lavaliered to and in love with for three years/ we broke up in June] and how did I feel or whatever and he says it is really sad, but he has never been in love and he turns 25 this week and whatnot. Then he starts talking about why he is freaking about us or whatever and it turns out it is because he really likes me and is content for the first time in his life. He says that I don't piss him off and he isn't sick of me yet (it has been three months and the longest he has ever dated someone until me is two months and that was an entire they met-they dated-they broke up period and she was called a girlfriend!) so anyway, it scares him cause he said that he thinks that this could serious and since he has never been serious that is weird for him and he said that he has changed. It turns out when he goes out now he no longer tries to meet girls, which he said was always his favorite thing to do, kind of the thrill of the chase thing. But now, he is satisfied so he is obnoxious unless his friend is digging on a chick and then he tries to help them out but he no longer tries to pick up girls.
He also started telling me about when I tell him where I am going out for an evening he ends up there too (sometimes on purpose, sometimes accidentally) and then he watches me all night wondering if I hit on guys. But he says I never do- they hit on me, then I am nice and politely tell them I am not interested. He said that intrigues him.
So in the end- he really likes me, he is really scared and so I told him that he could chill out. He is going to Atlanta this weekend to see his mom for his birthday (Saturday) and hers (Sunday) and he is coming back Monday and I am going to see him then. I figure I can give him a week to quit freaking out. He is also wondering did he pick the right city, cause Louisville isn't nearly as big as Johannesburg (hmm, 7 million to 1 million a little difference there!) and I know he misses his parents (only child) and his friends (total other continent) and he feels like I am all the security he has.

So, that is my dating drama... I know you understand cause you have drama when you date too! The thing is, I didn't mean to meet someone I actually like and (GULP) care about! But he is really an awesome guy. Okay, he is the smartest guy I have ever met (the first in awhile that I know is at least if not more smarter than me, and yeah he is smarter than me!) he is funny and makes me laugh the entire time I am with him!, he is really cute (my mom has the hots for him for Christ's sake!) I mean he is 6'1", muscular, but not like freaky, just right, blue eyes that are gorgeous and blonde hair. Plus, he has an incredible accent (I couldn't understand him at all for two weeks!)> He loves his mom and tells her everything plus he can speak two other languages! He is a doctor (DUH!) and besides all that, he likes to do a lot of different things, I am always learning new things about him! I like that because he intrigues me.



So anyway, here is my dilemma that I need help from you guys on... I also met another guy that is a Sigma chi alum from Western who is really nice. He is actually one of the sweetest guys I have met in a long while. The thing is Konrad and I agreed that we are not committed to one another, and he said I can do what I want with whomever so long as he doesn't know about it. I told him I wanted to know if he was dating somoene else and so far he hasn't. So the guy from Western is really awesome and sweet and I am digging him too, but if Konrad asked me to be exclusive with him I would. I don't want to do anything that would hurt anyone, (If I can keep from getting hurt, too, that would be nice!) So I went out with the new guy and we had fun last night... we actually really clicked, but I thought about Konrad last night too while I was with him. I told him that I was seeing someone else and he said that he plans on winning me over.
So what do you all think? Why is it when it rains it poors?