Politest Way To Say No

Kevlar281 · #1 01-12-2002, 12:43 PM

Not to mention any names and I hope by what I say it isn’t made obvious but I have a question about dirty rushing. Rush is coming up at U of H and a lot of pre-rush events/parties are going on. One GLO in particular after asking me what other Fraternities I had an interest in has really put the hard press on me. Whenever I go out with them I feel like I am cornered (being pressured). I more or less know what GLO I want to go with already but I still want to make sure I check out everyone else before I make such a huge commitment. Anyways like I said it’s to the point where I feel uncomfortable to go out with them. Which I am sure sounds pretty lame considering I am a guy but maybe I am just used to the relaxed atmosphere of the other GLO that they seem to have a problem with. It’s still pre-rush so I would hate to start declining another GLOs offers to come out to events but I feel like I am at that point. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

dzsaigirl · #2 01-12-2002, 02:11 PM

Hey Kev. I go to UH, and I can probably tell you some stuff you might not know. Who is interested in you and who are you interested in? Which one is pressuring you?

You can PM me if you feel more comfortable with that.

Kevlar281 · #3 01-12-2002, 04:06 PM

I just PMed you Dzsaigirl.

justamom · #4 01-12-2002, 05:19 PM

Hubby and I both graduated from Uof H. Though it was a LONG time ago, this doesn't sound too different from what wen on back then. Unless something changed, there were 3 or 4 strong (in number) fraternities, and the others, though smaller had their own distinct style which really suited some guys.

They kind of paired up. Even though these 4 fraternities were after the same guys, abc and xyz competed head to head and lmn qrs went head to head. The way it worked was they talked to different soro girls and found out who we knew, liked, dated and we suplied them with contact names. We were the best rec they could get on a guy. If we gave a glowing rec, then that fraternity REALLY went after them. I've mentioned this before, but since it is such a long time ago I can use names.
AXO dated Sigs(lil sis & big bro was VERY strong betwen us) and KA's. DZ and DG leaned to the PIKES and Sigs. All of us had girls dating Delta Sigs and a sprinkling in the others. I never heard of dirty rush until recently. They just really want you and don't want to lose you to a "competitor". Are there "dirty rush" rules in place now at Uof H? Heck were there ever? Hubby only went to the house I told him to go to...he'd be GDI today if I hadn't.

I would LOVE to hear your current impression of the GUYS!!! What do you like and all. BUcutie is Uof H too.

dzsaigirl · #5 01-12-2002, 05:37 PM

This is the deal at UH. I won't go into gory detail, but this is how it is. There are lots of fraternities here. About half you NEVER EVER see. Ever. The others are visible: pi kappa phi, sigma chi, delta upsilon, phi kappa theta, sigma nu, sig ep, pike and tke. Pike is in trouble right now and has lost their house again. They were off campus when I pledged because they had screwed up and they have only been back for something like 3 years or so and are already in serious danger again. This may actually be the last straw for them. TKE got involved in some shady activity like taking things that weren't theirs, etc. and were consequently removed from IFC. Then some stuff happened with their pres. Needless to say, they are pretty non-functional as far as the sororities are concerned. The other fraternities that I listed are doing really well. Pi Kappa Phi is really new...they just started about 2 years ago. The other fraternities are the "invisible" ones or they were disbanded in the '80's and '90's.

Fraternities do not have a very structured rush here. They basically find guys on campus and invite them out to their house to eat, play pool, go to basketball games, etc. They are not supposed to ever have alcohol present, but it almost always is, since the events turn into parties. The only one I can think of that I have never personally seen violating the rules is DU and that is 1) because they are rule following nice, responsible guys, 2) the IFC advisor is tight with them and therefore, they would be caught really easily. The dumbest thing that I hear happening with fraternity rush is guys complaining that other fraternities are "rushing their guys". Hello, that's the whole point! They should rush more than one group and pick the one they like! Anyway, it gets so possessive that the groups literally tell each other to stay out of their "area" at the UC games room and "we are talking to him..." like it's their girlfriend or something! HA! Of course, they invite us girls out so that they are seen with girls around them, which must mean that they are cool, right?

I wish it were more structured of a rush for the fraternities.

justamom · #6 01-13-2002, 09:10 AM

Only the names have changed...

Fraternity rush sounds just about the same. I remember our designated areas at the UC as well. The AXO table was across from the Pikes the DZ and DG's were to the left and right of the Pikes and the Sigs had a HUGE area in the back by the food counters. There was a running spade game and as people left for class someone would take their chair and the game played on.

You're right about the invisible fraternities. There were guys that you might see during Derby Days or at a IFC sponsored rec event that you never saw any other time.

Kevlar, I wish you the best. I hope you have the chance to look at all the fraternties that interest you.

WHEN DO YOU PLEDGE???