Dear the "BADDDDDest" Chick, (LOL)
If I was off this weekend, I would roll up there with some Popeye's chicken and biscuits, knock on your door with a smile and when you answer...accidently drop it in your neighbor's cat food then do the electric slide down your steps like

. NAHHHHH
Since I have to work, I'll just go get some and call you and gloat while I eat it.
Signed,
I AIN'T no chicken!
*"I ain't no joke" playing in the background*