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Let me mention something since I'm in the business of college athletics. First, PhychTau2 is certainly right about addressing the legitimate concerns of others. And, from reading this it sounds like the wrestling coach could have achieved the result he wanted by approaching it in a different way.
Keep two things in mind: first, college coaches RARELY want their players to be involved in ANY outside activities, especially any that might interfere with devotion to the team and teammates. It's just in the nature of coaches. Second, there is an NCAA angle to this to consider. The NCAA is VERY interested in involving "student-atheltes" in the mainstream of campus life, and that especially includes social activities that are outside atheltics. The wrestling coach probably could have handled it better, and his point of vierw should be considered. But if the kids, or the fraternities, had wanted to end this discussion dead quick, really all they had to do was go to the University's Director of Athletics and say, gee, we want to join a school-approved social group and the coach tells us not to do anything like that or we'll be dropped from the team. Can you have your Compliance Offcier call and get a ruling from the NCAA on whether we'd lose our chance to compete if we don't go along?
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