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I agree with everyone to some extent. I think that Exquisite brings up a very good point about A list versus B list.
I say tell the truth that you don't want to go and don't go to either one if you don't have to. That way, the girl won't waste her money and you won't waste your time. Plus, if she didn't want you there, she (or anyone else for that matter) shouldn't catch feelings if you don't show up. But let her know in due time what are gonna do. This way if she got someone else on her B list or C list that she wants to invite, she can do that. I personally feel that if she's inviting you for the gift, she should have thought about your relationship with her before she gave you an invitation. She should know by now if you and her don't get along and if she did it anyway, that's stupid on her part.
If you must go to one or the other, go to the shower, especially since it is at the office. You don't have to buy her a gift, but if you do, get her something small and useful. She SHOULD appreciate that.
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