Quote:
Originally posted by valkyrie
I'm noticing more and more comments young women make here and there involving getting married and/or having kids someday. I'm not trying to pick on anyone at all, but examples include saying something like I don't want to get a tattoo that could be visible in a wedding dress, or I don't want to get something monogrammed because I'll get married and change my name someday (and by "I" I don't mean me, of course, lol).
But what if it never happens? Sure, most people get married, but it's not guaranteed. What if you don't meet the man of your dreams? Will you settle for someone who's just okay because getting married is so important, or would you rather be single until and unless you meet someone so awesome you can't imagine spending the rest of your life without him? Isn't it presumptuous to assume it will happen?
The same goes for having kids. "When I have kids I'll..." is fine and all, but what if you don't? How can anyone assume it will happen? What if you never meet the right person, or what if one of you can't have kids? Will you adopt? What will you do?
I don't mean to be raining on anyone's parade, but it seems troubling that young women are putting so much thought into some future thing that might or might not ever happen. Yes, chances are, you will get married someday, but if you're not even dating someone you might want to marry now, why even think about it or plan for it?
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It's funny, because I was just thinking about this today and just found this post. I haven't read anyone elses posts to know what the most updated post is, but here's my thought.
Today I was driving and passed these condos in the city that I live in. My thought was, "In a couple of years I'd like to have enough money saved up to buy one." It got me thinking about this very subject. I am already planning on buying a house in a couple of years, because I actually do NOT expect to find anyone. And it's a really hard thought for me, because I would love to get married and have kids. I've always pictured myself in a huge two-story house with a BMW and a Mercedes and a dog. Well, right now I'm on the second floor of nice apartments with a Toyota Corolla Sport and a Dog. And that's fine by me, except I would like to buy my own place in a couple of years. OK, so I kind of got off subject. I started thinking that thinking I would buy a condo in a couple of years is crazy because I'm only 22 and for all I know I COULD be married in a couple of years. Granted, it's not very likely, but it could happen. I could meet someone tomorrow.
The thing is, I think this is what deep down most people think. Well, I will PROBABLY get married, and if I do I want to make sure I don't have monogrammed towels or a tatoo that will show in a dress or a newly bought condo when I have to move in with my husband in his two-story house with his Mercedes and BMW.
Also, I just bought a dog about a month ago. She is a very sweet 12-week-old Jack Russell, and chances are in the next 15 years I will have kids, so I'm trying to train her as if I will. I mean, maybe I won't have kids, but I would rather train her "just in case" to be used to kids and not jump on small kids or bite them. Just in case.
The fact of the matter is, all of us think at some point in the back of our minds that we won't get married one day or have kids, but when it comes down to it if we want the marriage and the kids eventually than we try to keep that thought at the back, and not the front.