[astroAPhi]

As someone who is adopted, I agree that it's pretty disgusting. If they were to do something along the lines of helping an adoptee find his/her birth parents, that's one thing. Helping that person financially to do it is nice too. But to try and deceive them is just messing with their mind.

The sad thing is that if your birth parents want to be found, it's really easy. All I did was to go to the agency that did my adoption, talk to a counselor to determine if I was ready, paid $300, and they did all the searching for me. They found my birth mother within a week, I think. They asked her if she felt ready to be in contact me and she said that she would be comfortable receiving letters. If my mom had said no, however, they would have given her their contact information in case she changed her mind, and called me back and tell me that it wasn't possible at this time. I was prepared for that possibility, and though it would be disappointing, I would have accepted it and not pursued it further. At this point in time, my birth mother is actually not comfortable telling me anything other than her first name, even though she knows my first and last name, where I went to school, and where I now work. I wouldn't have forced her to be in contact with me or tracked her down if she didn't want to be.

All of our contact so far has been through letters. I've only received one from her, but I did send her a few letters as well as graduation announcements. She has another life and an 18-year old daughter, so I'm trying not to be too pushy because I'm respecting her and her daughter's lives.