I knew that would come off as meaner than I meant it to be, and I apologize. My chapter has always been coed (chartered in 1976) and we never had a problem with saying "brothers." It just seems to me that someone who does have that big of an issue with it is the one who is in APO for the wrong reason.
Changing the toast song or adding verses is not something approved by nationals. Period. (Unofficial songs are a different matter - every sorority and fraternity has them) Honestly, why don't you just get rid of the use of "brothers" period and change it to "members?"
That's the slippery slope we will slide down if things like this start getting changed.