Quote:
Originally posted by AGDee
I have been overweight all my life. At times (college) I was only about 15 pounds overweight, but I've also been 140 pounds overweight (when I met my second husband, in fact). I'm a total yo-yo weight wise. The bottom line is, I have a beautiful face and I'm a beautiful person inside. My smile lights up a room and I'm confident (and sounding very conceited right now!). I'm a great catch because I'm independent, financially and emotionally and intelligent with a great sense of humor and a warm caring heart. My problem is that I'm completely intolerant of men's flaws so they get on my nerves and I reject them.
The true irony is, when I was in college and was just a little overweight, I had no confidence and stuck to one serious boyfriend. When I was at my heaviest, I had reached a point that I liked who I was and felt confident about myself in spite of my weight, and I had more dates than I had time for.
It's more about your self confidence and belief in yourself than it is about your weight. Were there men who didn't date me because of my weight? Probably. But, would those be the men who would stick with you through a pregnancy, a mastectomy, a 90 year old wrinkled body, or a colostomy? Probably not. If you don't love yourself the way you are, then why would somebody else?
Dee
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As usual, Dee speaks the gospel.
I'm a fat girl. There, I admitted it, so all you guys who think that's an insult, feel free to hurl it my way. I spent a long, long time clinging to men who were awful b/c they paid attention to me. I thought a bad relationship was better than being alone. I was convinced that no one would love me, and I settled for what I could get. I was miserable, and it was evident in everything I did. I truly believe that certain types of men can sense that out, figure out when a woman's confidence is low, and sweep in to call her pretty a few times, then treat her like shit.
Then, a few years ago, I chucked them all. I decided to take time FOR ME. I got in touch with who I am. I realized, yes, I'm plus sized, but I'm also intelligent, kind hearted, and, frankly, I have a great ass
. I learned to look in the mirror and pick out good things, not to sigh b/c my boobs were too big or that my hips are wide. I realized that people were right-I DO have a beautiful smile, I DO have a pretty face, I DO have good hair, etc. Before too long, that confidence came radiating through. Yes, I did lose a few pounds along the way, but I knew I did it FOR ME. A few months later, I met my now-husband, who is the kindest, sweetest human being on this world. My friends and family are insanely jealous of me, he treats me so well.
Phyllis-Good guys are out there, I promise. You're a beautiful, wonderful person-believe in yourself, and you'll find someone who will make you happy. You can lose weight, you can gain weight, it doesn't matter. Whatever you do DO IT FOR YOU.