|
I am on the fence about this particular incident as well. It was a bad social situation. His behavior after the incident is despicable (the bragging stuff), but not illegal. A friend of mine had a similar incident in college, except that there were pictures afterward. She drank one glass of jungle juice which just about put her under the table. She asked her best friend (a male in a fraternity who had been her friend for years) who she could trust to take her home because she was feeling bad, getting worse and just wanted to go home. He told her two different guys should be cool so she picked the one she thought was the least harmful. She said she vaguely remembered waking up in a car somewhere in a park and said "Where are we?". He told her the name of the park and she said "I want to go home now, take me home". The next time she woke up, she was in his bed with some her shirt and bra removed. She has no idea exactly what happened, but it was morning. She got her clothes on and came to my room, stunned and crying. This was back in the 80's when we wore our jeans so tight that he probably couldn't have gotten them off of her without her consent so she doesn't think she was raped. She was victimized though. Apparently he took pictures of her topless and showed them around the fraternity until it got to her friend, who promptly kicked his brother's butt. He had to apologize to the fraternity.
While I don't condone cashmoney's attitude that any girl who leaves with a guy is consenting to sex, women need to realize that a lot of men (not all, but a lot) see it this way. We have to keep an eye on our friends, especially if they get that drunk, and take them home ourselves, not abandon them at a party. We cannot change the way that some men think, so we have to protect ourselves by behaving responsibly. I am NOT saying she asked for it or that he was ok to do what he did. But, as women, if we don't want to be victimized, we can't act like victims and we have to be aware of how the "predator" is thinking, even if the predator is wrong in their thinking.
Dee
|