[AOIIBrandi]

I realize you want to be a lady and gracious about this, and I commend you for realizing that this is your brother and his fiancee's day,. You're right there should be as little conflict as possible, but please (if only for your parent's sake) don't let these people take advantage of your family. Go to the rehearsal dinner. Don't say anything about it to anyone either way. Your parents are paying/hosting so they will make sure they pay for the guest list + 1 ensuring that you have a plate and a place to site, and nothing will need to be said to anyone about it - they won't even need to send you an invite. As for the actual wedding, be glad you are not in it. Since her parents are paying for/ hosting the actual event you will just have to go with the flow there - whatever decisions she makes...