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Originally posted by thetalady
I am sorry... maybe I didn't state that clearly. I am not offended in any way at the comments that marriage is not for everyone. Of course not. I took offense at the comment that marriage is "really just something that makes people feel better about themselves". That seems to reduce the convenant to little more than a pop psych, self help group. I consider marriage far more important.
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The word "covenant" here indicates, to me anyway, that this is a religious value for you as well. Hey, that's cool - I can respect that, that's the entire point I was trying to make.
Quote:
Originally posted by thetalady
I am just surprised that the folks here, who value standing up in front of other people and making verbal and written promises and commit to stick together in another context, would be so negative about marriage.
After all, don't the marriage covenant and our GLO initiation have a lot in common? Yes, it is much easier to walk away from a fraternity or sorority if you are unhappy, but the concept that you commit to support one another through good times & bad is the same.
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This is such a total non sequitur. The reality is that this sort of verbal promise is what I consider to happen when you tell someone you 'love' them - since there is no analog to this for hetero male relationships, I took an oath to ksigkid that I would provide him anything he needs (and this is still true, almost 18 months since I've seen him last). The error here, in my mind, is the assumption that everyone desires or requires a ceremonial introduction to these 'verbal and written promises' - but I'll leave that for later.
And doesn't it seem slightly trivial to compare your initiation rites to your marriage vows? I get where you're going, but the similarity is weak for me. They're similar in goal, but disparate in function and scope (not to mention that one is a legal contract, while the other leads to intoxication and manhugging).