[AKA_Monet]

Look Mr., I gonna give the benefit of the doubt of NOT doing a search on me and seeing what I am about, 'cuz everybody up in this GC knows who I am and where I stand. And although they may, and often do disagree with me, they do it respectfully... If not, they do get clowned by me.

First off, I am 36 years old AND I am married--just to let you know.

Originally posted by cashmoney
Damn, you make me feel like I'm some bad person here. I'm the fucking victim. I wasn't being domineering. I wasnt trying to turn her against her mom. Besides, who the fuck are you to tell me I'm too young to be thinking about getting married? I'm almost 25 fucking years old. How old are you? And to set the record straight, I was the one who walked out. She didnt choose to end anything.....I did.

No Sweetheart, YOU ARE NOT THE BAD PERSON HERE!!! If you can read my post, then you can understand that you just don't start ANY relationship with, "Don't call me if we break up, 'cuz I won't be around" when you FIRST start dating...

The way YOU had explained it, you started off with the PRESUMPTION of a your relationship with this "TEENAGER" on a RESTRICTION... A LOVING MARITIAL relationship ought to be OPEN for EXPLORATION--not a guarded to protect yourself from exposing all your faults. That's the issue with LOVE, you DO leave yourself wide open to others...

And the FACT that you JUST stated YOU WALKED OUT--NEVER ALLOWING HER TO DEFEND HER ACTIONS--clearly states that you gave yourself an "OPT-OUT" clause from the beginning of the relationship. You already had it in YOUR mind that if your relationship failed--it will ALL be the OTHER person's fault--not yours--the classic "POOR ME"... Well, Sweetheart, it takes 2 to tango... And the least you COULD have done is allow the girl a chance--But it sounds like you CHOSE to blindside her... I don't give a DAYUM about THAT MOTHER... YOU CHOPPED Gwirlfriend's whole princess fairytale up, like Freddy Krueger, without giving her a chance... You basically said, I'm out... I'm sorry, but for someone you are about to marry, do you think that was the wisest of choices? What other times will you walk out on someone you "allegedly" love?

Originally posted by cashmoney
I don't have anger issues. I've tried to talk to her mom. You know what her mom said to her when she found out I tried to get a hold of her to come have a talk with her face to face??? She told her to tell me that she (her mom) was CRAZY and that coming and talking to her wasnt in my best interest.

My point EXACTLY--this girl WAS NOT READY TO BE IN ANY MARITIAL RELATIONSHIP WITH ANYONE!!! REGARDLESS OF WHAT YOU WANTED TO DO OR SAY TO THAT MOTHER!!!

Originally posted by cashmoney
As far as the get to know you phase, we did that. She knows more about me than my own parents, and my family and I are pretty fucking close. And I wasnt trying to dictate her relationship to her family at all.....thats why I fucking left. Her entire family, including extended, loves me. Its just her mother who doesnt like me. Her dad tells me I'm like his son. And domestic violence?? WTF are you talking aboout? I've never hit a chick in my life, never even came close to it.

The FACT that you said she knows more about you than her outta to TELL you that 1) She doesn't even KNOW who she is or 2) She's hiding some secret about herself... I gather it is the first one... Since she doesn't know what she wants, how in the JESUS CHRIST HAYLE DO YOU THINK YOU CAN TELL THIS "TEENAGER" TO TELL HER MOTHER TO BACK THE FCUK OFF??? HOW??? That is what I mean with dictating her familial relationship... For all you know, HER MOTHER IS HER FAMILIAL RELATIONSHIP!!! Pops don't care, and doesn't even want to know--look at his inaction...

And believe me, getting this "teenager" to go against her mother can BE misconstrued as DOMESTIC VIOLENCE... If you go to all the Domestic Violence websites, you will OBVIOUSLY see that VERBAL ABUSE is the NUMBER ONE on the start to this type of violence... WORDS hit harder than a fist...

And if how you have reacted to me is any indication of how you chose to break up with this "teenager", then, I am telling you, you are being VERBALLY ABUSIVE... But, fortunately, for me, I can take it... Bring in on in my books... But, do you think your EX could take it??? (In fact, all your posts are not well dictated, but that's my opinion)...

The FACT that you break up with this "teenager" without giving her a CHANCE to defend herself with her THOUGHTS goes to show that you are doing some sort of "reward and punishment" tactic. You can think I am full of isht, but that is what some counselors will call it if you speak to them...

Originally posted by cashmoney
And just to add....I'm not trying to recover from this. I don't feel bad about anything. What the hell do you mean by me recover? I know myself, there isnt any insight I need in regards to knowing myself.

Really, now??? Okay, Honey... Good luck on your next relationship... Guess you know how to handle it... Guess you way is right and you know what to do... So why are you bitching and moaning about this break up??? Why is it hurting you tremendously??? Because you have invested too much of YOURSELF into it??? Should a MARITIAL RELATIONSHIP BE BASED ON HOW MUCH TIME AND MONEY YOU PUT INTO IT??? I dunno??? 'Cuz, I don't based my marriage on money...

But I do know relationships and have been in PLENTY of bad ones to understand the role I played in them so that I could move up, be a better person and move on to my husband--an exceptional MAN that I have eva known other than my father and grandfather...

I also do know that calling her under ANY circumstances because of the way you chose to leave this "teenager" and the length in time you "gave up on her" ain't gonna beneficial to you, with this MIL issue looming over you all... I can tell that by the way you made your "ignorant" comments to me... All I can ask is, "what nerve did I hit?" Or rather--DENIAL AIN'T JUST A RIVER IN EGYPT...

You played some role in this relationship, too... You ALLOWED it to end in some fashion... Your reasons are your reasons. And if you have to "save face--or save your dignity" to feel "justified" in your actions with ending your relationship with some teenaged girl that you were ABOUT TO DAYUM NEAR MARRY WITH RESOLUTE ANGER AND RESENTMENT--that OBVIOUSLY TELLS ME (and some other people) that you ain't ready to be married, or possibly you ain't ready to be married to this girl...

At the very, you should have cheated on girlfriend to give her justification as to why you ain't gonna marry her... That is why she is falling apart, 'cuz you ENDED IT WITHOUT PROVACATION--why, cuz of her DAYUM MOTHER??? I'm sorry, that is an EXCUSE on your part... Why should you get along with that mother??? Why do you care--really? And if you truly did love this girl to what to marry her, would grounds a break-up be due to that crazy-assed mother? You should have been man enough to either quiet your trap and take it from the bitch, or speak up when you had the chance... But you CHOSE to PUNK OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP... And that's what is lame on your part... AND THERE IS NO RECOVERY FROM YOU FUBAR OF THIS RELATIONSHIP--YOU WALKED OUT... YOU CHOSE TO DO IT FROM THE GET-GO--YOU LITTLE _____... (and that is EXACTLY what the mother is telling that daughter of hers...)

Either way, good luck of your pursuit...

And I am out of this mess... No mo' comments from me trying to be helpful... And if my way ain't right for you, then hey--I apologize... But you are whining and complaining about something you got "yo'sef pizz-layed" right into...