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Challenges of being an adviser (from my experience)
* Sometimes your expectations can be too high. A lot of maturing goes on after you leave college. It is easy to forget that the average 19 year old's brain is still developing and sometimes can't process the myriad responsibilities of leadership: deadlines, time management, making good choices, not playing favorites in the chapter or aiming for the "popular" vote, forgetting to check in weekly with an adviser, procrastination, risk management issues.... and generally acting like a 19 year old. It's ok to have expectations, but remember the age level you are dealing with and sometimes the role of an adviser is to remind gently and allow them to make mistakes.
* Being out of the loop. Not all chapter leaders are diligent about checking in with advisers. This is especially true when there has been an "incident" in the chapter. They want to cover it up, because they fear punishment. Rather than come down too "parental" on them, reward honesty and openess and lead by example.
* Getting too close. It's fine to be friendly, but you can't be their friends. As an adviser you must keep it professional and you must always remember that you are there to serve as a role model. Even if you were the poster child for misbehavior as a collegian, you must not egg the current collegians on with stories of your wild youth or "back before it was considered hazing, we did abc...."
* Liabilities like hazing and risk management. One way to nip these is to encourage your chapter officers to engage the chapter in open discussions and workshops. Talking about chapter traditions and what is safe/what isn't safe can help clarify what's ok to do.
* Your chapter officer needs to be in communication with you. You shouldn't be the one chasing them down. If your advisee repeatedly misses meetings with her adviser, or is not cc'ing you on her decisions and duties, she should be reprimanded by the standards committee and reminded of her obligations as set forth in the national officer job descriptions (In ADPi at least, there are certain officers who must check in with their advisers on a weekly basis).
* You're not there to lead the chapter. You are there to advise the officers. Don't do the job for them. You can plant ideas, but let the officers run with them, and if you conceive it cleverly enough, plant the seed so the officers come up with the idea "on their own" with your encouragment.
* Reward positive behavior, learn with them when you make mistakes, reprimand with authority and grace when something really wrong happens and communicate with the chapter. Make sure the new members know who you are and have your contact information, along with the rest of the chapter. In some chapter situations, when the leadership is corrupt, members don't feel comfortable following "the chain of command" and in those cases do need to inform an adviser if a chapter leader is out of line or a chapter situation is brewing.
* Meet regularly with other advisers and alumnae officers to vent frustrations, brainstorm and support one another.
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