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Originally posted by suwhitestl
They do take the letters back before the event ends. Then give them again on Bid day. I don't think most girls share their letters with anyone else. If they did they would find they are very similar and not nearly as special as they made them feel on preference day.
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This is what they did at my chapter, as well. I didn't get my preference letter back until Bid Day, with my first set of letters, my plaque, and all the other goodies that our wonderful NMC (GC's own adpi*nurse
) put together for all the Alphas!
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Panhel has asked to read all the letters after preference this year and we have made a commitment to review all letters before preference to avoid any unintended bid promising.
The women have been given sample letters before (which helps alot of women since this can be a hard letter to write) - but each want to put their own things in there which makes their recruitment advisor (yours truly) ver nervous!
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I can understand wanting to put their own things into the letters they write (my letter included being far from home, since both of us were from California), and you should put something personal in there....maybe have a little discussion with the collegiates about writing the personal anecdote they want to share with the PNM, then have all the letters end with something such as they hope the PNM finds this, whatever their decision may be (that way, it doesn't sound like a bid promise).
The idea of Panhellenic reading the letters also seems like a good idea to lessen the potential of an inadvertent bid promise in the letter, but at the same time I would feel a little squeamish having PH reading the pref letters that were wrriten by sisters (just in case the way they phrased something did sound like a bid promise)...maybe having the collegiates write a rough draft of their pref letter before they write the "official" pref letter, so you know what's being said ahead of time and can help them rephrase it if it sounds a little too much like a potential promise of a bid?