[HPU PIKE]

It was a brisk October evening in a suburban hospital outside of Norfolk, VA in the year 1984. The wind was howling, the moon was shining bright and there was a magical presence in the air. In a modest hospital room a woman was having contractions...just playin. However, for anyone interested in hearing my incredibly dull and unentertaining life story, feel free to ask. I charge by the minute for the telling of my story. CASH ONLY!

Anyway, before my post ventures even further beyond relevant or comprehensible, here are my stats:

Born: Norfolk, VA

1/2 of K.- Birdneck Elementary/ Norfolk, VA

1/2 of K. through 2nd- Bloomingdale Elementary/ Savannah, GA

3rd through 6th- Kanawha Elementary/ Parkersburg, WV

7th through 9th- Blennerhassett Jr. High/ Lubeck, WV

10th through 12th- Parkersburg South HS/ Parkersburg, WV

College- High Point University/ High Point, NC


Joined Pi Kappa Alpha in Spring of 03'. Communications major.


For a full-text version of my life story, send $4.3 billion (in cash) to:



ME



Or call:



555-IGIVEOUTMYLIFESTORYFORRIDICULOUSLYLARGESUMSOFMONEY (INCASHONLY)



It's late, i'm tired. Waiting for the ny-quill to kick in. I digress....