Quote:
Originally posted by cuaphi
Just for a different twist on this: my boyfriend grew up dirt (we're talking food stamps and government cheese) poor. His dad was a social worker and his mom was disabled and only worked intermittenly. He put himself through school on grants and student loans, worked his ass off and now makes a very good income. Meanwhile, I was a little bit of a spoiled brat. Suburbs, county clubs, didn't have to pay for my own cars, etc.
He's very, very smart, has a great work ethic and sense of financial responsibility and is pretty nice to boot. However, sometimes he shows more of a working class mentality and some blatant resentment towards those that didn't have to work as hard to get where they are.
So, how much do you guys think background plays a role in all of this? We all fundamently need the same values as our partner but do you think two people can arrive at the same point from extremely disparate starting points? Strangely, I think you can because we're doing okay so far.
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I was trying to get at that, obviously you explained it better. You can be blue collar and still be intelligent and make a lot of money, but it is the upbringing that is significant. A person who grew up in a financially stable household will almost always view life differently from someone who has not.
This is just my observation...People who grew up disadvantaged tend to me more security-oriented, vigilant, resilient, and streetwise than those who didn't grow up disadvantaged. Those who have always had their needs fulfilled tend to be more idealistic, luxury-oriented, sensitive, and naive. Sooner or later there are going to be some clashes and some difficulty in relating. On the other hand, if both partners are adaptable and understanding, a relationship can work.