The girl who was my roomate my freshmen and sophomore years joined the ICOC.
I use the sad face because it was so sad to lose my friend. She joined that church sometime in the year or so after we stopped living togther (I had gone to England on a work visa and she lost her financial aid and had to move home). In the subsequent years, she would ONLY talk to me about the ICOC or "bible study" or about her "quiet time". Even though I am a practicing Christian, she still insisted I should attend HER church's services.
One day I ran into her and, yet again, she wanted to get to me do a Bible study with her. I finally decided to go, knowing full well that her church, in my opinion, is cult-like. I just wanted to see what it was about and where she might be in all of it.
She said it would be me and her in a casual discussion but, surprise surprise, she brought two other people with her. She "led" the study while the other two sat there and did not contribute. Rather, it was quite painfully obvious that it was all a set up and that she was following a pre-planned study set up in attempt to demonstrate to me that my Christian beliefs were not cutting it and that the ICOC "has it right."
The other two girls would turn to the exact same passage of scripture BEFORE my friend even mentioned it; plus, those verses were already underlined in their Bibles. I was so not fooled. Then, my friend would ask a question to the "whole group" but everyone would turn and look at me for my answer. When I did answer, one of them would ask follow-up questions in an attempt to get me to say something contrary to scripture. For example, they kept trying to get me to admit that my baptism was invalid and that I wasn't fulfilling The Great Commission because I wasn't inviting random strangers to church on a daily basis.
I remember that one girl started to realize that I wasn't going to crack easily and started pressing me with leading questions. "Wouldn't you agree that this scripture tells us that we should be doing XYZ?" When I wouldn't answer the way she wanted, she would press me some more. Finally, I turned to her and said something to the effect of, "Clearly you don't approve of my answers. Tell me what you want to hear and I'd be happy to humour you." At that moment, the expressions on their faces told me that they realized I was a lost cause and we ended the "Bible study".
Here's the absolute worst. This is the moment when I realized that I had truly lost my friend:
A year or so later, I lost my mother unexpectedly. Of course, it was devastating and sad for all of us. A few months later, I got a phone call from my friend out of the blue. I was pleased to hear from her because I still cared about her as my old roomie and friend. She started by asking how I was. I gently informed her that much had happened since we last spoke and that I was sad to report that my mother had died. Get this, she responded with, "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, I'll pray for you. So, my church is having a BBQ next Saturday and I wanted to know if you wanted to go."
Oh boy.
I don't mean this to sound funny or flippant, but she really did sound "brainwashed" at that point. She went on and on about how she had been hanging out with some guy at her church, that she had met his parents for dinner and that she hoped that "they" will let them start dating soon. Mind you, she was like, 23 years old at this time.
I just didn't know what to do for her. I think I saw her around campus a couple times after that, but I haven't heard from her since.
.....Kelly