[angelove]

If you were, or currently are, an undergrad woould you extend membership to a pregnant woman or a woman who had very young child(ren).

This was the original question, and we're answering it, including those of us who are apparently royal Stepford Wives from the 18th century. No one is trying to tell a mother/mom-to-be not to go through recruitment or how to run her life in general - the original poster wanted to know whether we would extend membership, and my answer was no. I agree with greencat that it's not going to go over well at the more traditional schools. I was pretty surprised by the poster who had a 28 year old sister - kids or not, that seems unusual.

I find it kind of odd that so many who have posted here seem to think that it's appropriate to tell women with children how to behave and where their priorities should be. It's not your job to tell a woman how to run her life, period.

Maybe your chapter is different, but as I recall, my chapter had a lot of rules and regulations that could be perceived as telling me how to behave and where their priorities should be. I couldn't drink while wearing letters or in the house, couldn't have my boyfriend over past a certain hour, etc. Sororities have a tendency to shape their members by setting priorities for them (you must make certain grades, study x number of hours, etc.), so if they can tell women without children how to behave and where their priorities should be, why should we exempt mommies?

Didn't any of you have parents who belonged to social/service organizations as you grew up? What's the difference between an organization in college and the commitment that many require in post-collegiate organizations?

Yes, many parents (including me) are active in social organizations, but we're not talking about the Masons or Junior League or Rotary, here - we're talking about organizations that demand an overwhelming amount of time, second only to collegiate studies.

I don't think anyone on this thread is making moral judgments - if chapters did that, no one would ever be recruited - but those of us who would not extend membership to a mom/MTB are simply being realistic.