I'm always surprised when people think your life is over when you have children. There is this child phenomena that goes around saying that you have to give up everything you want to do in your life to raise good children. Personally, I think that's a bunch of bull. My children will get everything they need to be good people, but I'm not giving up my personal social and career goals so I can be someone's idea of the "perfect mother", only to end up with no friends, no hobbies, and a sinking career when they go off to college. It happened to my Mom, and it won't happen to me!
You all are way too stiff. Not an appropriate activity?? Who are you, royality from the 18th century? I don't think that's you decision, but the decision of the girl who wants to pursue membership.
My boyfriend has a three yer old girl and is a VERY active member of his fraternity, AND he lives in the house. If you didn't read the Article he wrote, you can read it here
http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=49380&highlight=Stanfor d .
His daughter does not sleep there (except on the occasional Friday night), but she is there all the time, as he takes care of her every other day when she is not at preschool. She likes being in the house, and knows the names of all the boys in the fraternity. He's a good father, a good member, a good student and a good boyfriend and it works out for everyone. Granted, he doesn't sleep as much as he would sometime want to, but he's doing things he wants to do in his life.