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weddings in new york easily cost $100-125 per person. and that's on the moderate side.
for the shower i give a 50-75 dollar gift from the registry. for the wedding i give 100 dollars or 150-200 if i'm taking a guest. more for my closest friends though. if i'm not buying from the registry, i refuse to make up a "charming and delightful" gift that is probably neither charming or delightful for the couple. it's like getting 4 baskets of bath and body works crap at christmas. you don't want any of them and the baskets themselves are a waste and you're stuck with the smelly junk for the next 10 years. don't make your own present. use the registry or give a check
for whoever said to just give a card and then send a present a year later...tacky. you can't go to a wedding and not give anything. talk about cheap.
and bridesmaids absolutely still have to give a gift. even if it's small.
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