hmm.... girls definately have it worse b/c i like it when guys are bigger- not huge and gross fat- but a beer belly isn't a big deal to me...
i'm 5' 7" and i was a stable 150 pounds all through high school- when i would say i was uncomfortable- all i got was a "you aren't- your just tall- it all works out" yeah... but i'm still uncomfortable! i dated in high school- but i mostly just hung out with friends.. then i got to college- within my first semester i dropped 20 pounds b/c of all the activity- and wow... the responses i got were astounding- all i got was- you are so thin and so beautiful- blah blha blha- it was the topic of conversation all over- guys were paying attention to me- i was dating one of the most wanted boys on campus... it was absolute heaven- i had a great set of friends- i was finally happy and successful and i actually had found my niche in life.... then aout a year and half later i went on birth control (the patch) b/c of cramps (the pill made me too sick) and ilived with 7 guys and 1 other girl and a kegorator..... i gained back those 20 pounds.... and the compliments stopped coming... i was still dating that guy- but things were bad between us... i wasn't getting the same attention- luckily i had my friends and a good base- and i just had to buy some new clothes...i have to say again- i KNOW i'm not fat...but i'm uncomfortable- being in london has just exacerbated this fact... everyone is stick skinny and dresses fantastic... so now not only am i large.... but i'm wearing my favorite sweatpants.... f*ck me....
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moral of the story... i'm not really sure... i'm still confused and am trying to work out and not eat a whole bunch (b/c of the birth control- i doubt i will lose anything less than 10 pounds) i think as a result i just make fun of it and try to make it funny- my friends have alwyas joked about being fat- going to wendys or taco bell and eating massive amounts of food...in the parking lot of the restaurant... lol... its a normal thing- we're normal girls... some take it too far and develop eating problems.. i see that beautiful girl walking down the street and all the guys look- bu ti know that they look at me too... it all works out in the end i guess... especially if yo uhave a sense of humour about it...
