Quote:
Originally posted by AlethiaSi
yes! i know exactly what you mean.... this happens a lot with close friends of mine.... for instance... my flatmate- we've been best friends for 3 years- and we lived together last year too- now we're in a different country- and all of the things that didn't bother me before are totally in my face since i don't really have too many places to go (b/c i don'thave my sisters or other firends to go to- like i do at home) she is so closeminded sometimes when she brags about being openminded.... and she's always complaining about things that we all feel (tired- hungry etc) and i really hate that she can be really insensitive sometimes- ( i used to be clinically depressed- and i'm on antidepressants- i struggle with it everyday- and its really hard for me) and she's just like- oh get over it... i've never noticed that she can be sooo harsh... and then when i joke around with her about something- she blows it out of proportion and freaks out.... (the other morning i didn't have my keys to get in- and i woke her up... i was kinda still drunk from the night before and i was like oh come on *sshole get the door... it was harsh- but i was COMPLETELY joking and she should know that- she didn't talk to me for 3 days!)
i don't know what to say to her about all this- but i know one of these days i'm just going to freak out- and our friendship might be over b/c she can't handle criticism like that.... i've lost 3 best friends because when i finally speak up- they can't take it- scream at me and leave... just b/c i was speaking my feelings... so i'm pretty scared to say anything... but i don't know waht else to do... things are better now- her boyfriend is visiting for a few weeks- so i don't ahve to deal with her so much and when i do- things are back to normal- b/c she really is a good friend- listening to me- backing me up etc- thats why it was so weird she started acting so weird here... 
|
My advice would be to have a sit down with your friend. Tell her how you feel. But try not to be confrontational about it. Don't yell at her and say you're doing this, that and the other thing. Just tell her calmly that you feel that she's being insensitive to your depression. Both of you need to listen to each other. If you're calm about it, she'll be more likely to listen to you and not scream at you and blow things out of proporation.
Of course all this is easier said than done.
It took me a long time to have a discussion with my "friend" (turned out she really wasn't my friend) about how she was treating me. It didn't go so well and nothing was resolved. Partly because I left it so long that I wasn't calm and rational about a lot of things and partly because she was a selfish b****.