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Remember, the event is about the BRIDE, not her 18 year old bridesmaid. The bridesmaid should be mature enough to understand this.
For ways to incorporate the underage, you can have a nice dinner followed by a lingerie party-- where the bride gets gifts to use on her honeymoon. You can play games, etc. THEN, get the limo and go out on the town for an evening of dancing and drinking with the ladies who are of age.
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