About a year ago, I dated a guy with a grammar problem:
He didn't understand the difference between "I am divorced" and "I am
getting divorced." To me, they were entirely different things.
Not only was the divorce not final, but his wife was still in town and still had a key to the house. Not good.
One evening I was over there, we were watching movies and I was trying to figure out what I was going to do about the whole situation. So, we're sitting there on the couch talking and suddenly I hear this "bing bing" from the other side of the house. It was the sound alarms make when you open a door or window. He freaks out, jumps up and hisses at me, "Ohmygod!!! It's my WIFE!!!!! Quick, you HAVE TO HIDE!!!" I'm just too in shock about the whole thing to even react and he leads me to a closet and I go in. (At least it was a big walk in closet). So there I am, stuck in the closet like the Other Woman!
I'm trying to eavesdrop as well as I can. Apparently she's mad at him because he didn't call her back about something a day or so ago, and then she had tried to call that night but he hadn't picked up the phone because he was busy trying to convince me not to dump his stupid married butt. She starts yelling and whining about something, he's trying to calm her down and get her to leave. The whole time I am just waiting for her to realize I'm there (I had kicked off my sandals earlier - they were still by the couch and my purse was on the coffee table) and come find me and claw my eyes out. Finally she says she's just going to get her mail and stomps out.
So he comes to get me out of the closet. He opens the door and I am just standing there, glaring at him. He starts trying to apologize, I just cut him off and said "Take. Me. Home. NOW!!!"
He called a couple days later. I told him I really didn't see how this could possibly work. He was still married and I was totally uncomfortable with it. What if she had found me in the closet that day? That is not a situation I ever want to find myself in again. Then he tells me he thinks she did know someone was there because now she is demanding more money from him. Sorry, buddy, that's not really my problem now, is it?
The moral of the story: Dating married people is a bad idea. Relationships are complicated enough without having a third person involved. And look at it this way - the marriage is messed up usually because one (or both!) of them is screwed up in the head. So either you're dating the psycho, or their current spouse is the psycho and will probably make trouble for you!