I am so sorry Mary! Losing an animal is one of the hardest thing to go through. *hug*
The worst was this past summer. Peaches was a white, spotted with cream cat. My neighbor and best friend owned her, but Peaches was practically mine too. She was an outdoor cat so she always ran across the street to greet me, she totally knew my cars. When I was little she'd come over and we'd sit on the porch and when it got cold I'd give her milk. I really loved this cat and when annoy Katie's parents when I thought it was too cold for Peach to be out b/c I'd call them at midnight and say Peaches is still out do you want me to walk her over? This summer Peaches was 14 and my family and I had gone somewhere for the day and it was raining outside. On the way home I said I hope Peaches is under some cover (Peaches hated the rain!!!!) When we got home it was about 11pm and I didn't see Peaches, but I k new she had to be close b/c she normally hid at our house when it rained. But when I stepped outside I saw her under my car, I called her a few times but she didn't move. She had been rolled by a car, not hit - just rolled, and she went under my car to lay down. It was so hard for me to cope with b/c Peaches didn't deserve to die that way. She deserved to live the rest of her life out in a safe environment. I love, love, love my best friend but I always wanted to adopt Peaches b/c she was too special to be an outdoor cat on a busy street.
The only good part was that somehow Peaches managed to get under my car to get out of the rain. Which I cried and cried about, b/c she hated rain....so at least she wasn't wet. Ahh....
I think the best way to cope with this is just to talk about it. I couldn't at the time, but this is the first real time I've gone over it. Sorry its so long! One way I helped though was to donate money to a local shelter and visit shelters or Pet Smart to play and be around the kitties and puppies.
Okay, now I'm going to go hug my kitty!