[D.COM]

Originally posted by Rain Man
I am really enjoying this discussion. I would like to say for the record, that men/husbands do not have it easy just because of the wife submitting to the husband. The men have their work cut out for them and they do have to step up to the plate when it comes to being the head of the household.

Do I believe in a balance between husband and wife? YES, I DO!!! The husband supplies the food, the wife supplies the meal. The husband supplies a house, the wife supplies a home. The husband supplies the seed, the wife supplies the child. Etcetera and so on.

Further, I feel another point is being missed on this whole submit/obey debate. When you really love your husband, and really want to put your all into the relationship, your submission won't come because you feel morally obligated to do so, it will come naturally. It won't feel like submission. Because the husband is putting his all to please you and to keep you feeling secure, you will naturally want to please him, and to keep him encouraged in his endeavors. I think that by wives being submissive to their husbands does not mean you will let your husbands be tyrants and dictators and walk all over you like a rug. NO! What it means is that while you may not always agree with him in his decisions that affect the family, you RESPECT his decisions because he is the head of the household and ultimately responsible for the acheivements and setbacks of the family as a family. In a nutshell, I am divorced for that very reason; my ex could not respect a major decision I had to execute as head of the family (and was a very tough decision to come to). She got upset, refused to talk to me, and ended the marriage, not knowing that afterwards, my personal life picked up immediately afterwards, and she could have been a part of that.

Now that I think about it, the reason why the word "obey" has an inferior ring to it, is because of the present day stigma attached to it. It implies, "I am the head, you are the tail", when in a marriage, it should imply, "I am the head, you are the neck that turns the head".

Hope this helps.

Match Game '73

Originally posted by loviest95
Well here is my $19.08... the word obey was not in my vows but I will say that I believe that a man is and should be the head of the household.. but as you know head does not mean dictate.. every good leader has good council and that is what I am -- my husband's council and some times I give him just a little nudge in the right direction .

and since he is to love me as CHRIST loves the church I have no problem because if my sweet hubby LOVES me that much then he'll do everything in his power to take good care of me

But I will say this "Ladies have your own relationship with God..before you have a relationship with anyone...."

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IVY in my HAND-- AKA in my HEART

[This message has been edited by loviest95 (edited April 20, 2001).]

I am not married (yet?) but I agree with both above.