Quote:
Originally posted by Taualumna
But don't you think that there are families that wonder why their 40something son isn't married yet? Or some families wondering why their 21 year old son has never had a girlfriend? Guys don't have the same pressure because, well, guys don't get pregnant.
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Maybe they are gay. *shrug* I think that this thread has gotten off the intended topic so I'll attempt to get it back on track.
I am a graduate of a private school in NYC. It was not a 'finishing school,' but an educational institution. A part of the education including becoming a well-rounded person which included attending Broadway plays and musicals, dining in the finer restaurants in Manhattan, going to museums, visiting embassies, meeting ambassadors and politicians, traveling, and learning how to speak English well and properly. We did not have etiquette lessons per se, but we were instructed to be on our best behavior in appropriate clothing. I remember the French club had our annual lunch at Le Perigord. One of the students was not on his best behavior and was not allowed to attend the next year. The teacher made students essentially audition to attend future luncheons. We attended a play or musical each semester. This was in addition to the rigorous academic standards we had to meet. My school was not as expensive or as exclusive as many of the schools in Manhattan, but it is well regarded by educators. In fact, many of the students were children of public school teachers as well as politicians and people who struggled to pay tuition. The expectation was that we would attend college. In my six years there, only one student did not go on to college since she got married instead.
In all of my life, I have only encountered that one girl from high school who wanted to just get married. It is very rare to meet someone like that in New York City. I have met many women who hit a certain ageor stage in their lives and want to settle down, or they meet someone, fall in love, and get married. Most of my friends are educated and continue their careers after they become mothers because it is financially necessary for them to do so. This is an expensive city. As far as I know, they and their husbands don't earn $800,000 or anything close to that. For the most part, my friends are middle class. They have some good years and some years were they struggle. The older we get the more we have. Some of my friends who are mothers would like to stay home, but they cannot afford to do so.
There are as many different stories as there are people on this planet. Women and men feel pressure from their families, culture, society, faith, their circle of friends, and themselves to accomplish certain things at certain points in their lives. Not everyone can fulfill these expectation. Not everyone wants to. I think the key is respecting the right for people to choose the life that is right for them. Not everyone wants to get married or have children. Not everyone wants to juggle a career and motherhood. There is nothing wrong with that. I heard Maria Shriver say, "You can have it all, just not at the same time." I agree with that. Decide what life you want, be flexible, and don't judge other people for their choices.