[Lil' Hannah]

THE DICK VITALE DRINKING GAME

*It is strongly recommended that this game NOT be played if/when Dick is calling a Duke basketball game.

Rules:

#1 Dick Head
One (1) Dick Head must be selected for the group. The Dick Head should be knowledgeable of the Dick Vitale Universe, ie. Duke, Coach K, and all that is front-runner. The Dick Head shall be the final arbiter in all disputes and judgements, and shall be called simply Dick Head.

#2 Coach K
A) Anytime Dick mentions Coach K or Mike Krzyzewski, the first person to yell “I coach for relationships,” gets a pass, but all others must drink (3).
B) Dick is calling a Duke game, and praises Coach K right after K has clearly dropped an F-bomb on a ref, the Dick Head must take a shot.

#3 Duke
A) First mention = drink (1), second = drink (2), etc.
B) “Cameron Crazies/Dukies”: first mention = drink (1), second = drink (2), etc.
C) “What’s not to love about Duke” = drink (3)
D) Shameless references to self as “Dukie Vitale” = Dick Head takes a shot

#4 Carolina
A) First mention = drink (1), second = drink (2), etc.
B) At every mention of “Kris Lang” first to shout “nice photo Krissy!” gets pass, all else drink (1)

#5 Beautiful Wife
Each time Dick mentions his, or anyone’s “beautiful wife” all female participants must drink (3)

#6 Hair
Every time Dick spouts off about someone’s hair, such as:
“I’m so jealous of Billy Donovan’s beautiful hairstyle” or “I’d do anything to have that head of hair (on Tom Izzo)” the baldest person in the room gets to hand out a shot.

#7 Dickisms
All must drink (1) for any Dickisms (Dick Head shall govern):

“Diaper Dandy” “Rolls-Roycer” "PTP’er” “Trifecta (Dick calls it Trifecter)” "3-S’s” “Little Davey Odom” and so on …

#8 My Buddy (or my friend)
Whenever Dick starts name dropping, ie. “My good friend Bob Knight,” or “My buddy Brent Musburger,” or “This morning I was talking to A-Rod again,”
drink (2)

#9 I Gotta Believe (or I truly/really believe)
Most commonly heard as “I really believe Jason Williams is one of the top point guards in the nation, college or pro,” or “I gotta believe that North Carolina is going to be back.” Drink (1)

#10 Personal Agenda
Every time Dick starts harping on his personal agenda, such as eliminating the alternate possession or changing rules so that graduation rates are not impacted by transfers, the last person to yell “shut up Dick!” must drink (5)

#11 Michelangelo
When Dick whips out a dead horse from the past, such Dean Smith “the Michelangelo of coaches,” or “Shane Battier for President,” all drink (3), and the oldest participant hands out a shot.