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I think the difference between compromising and settling can be found in the individual's motivation for conceding on certain points. If you concede on an issue because it's something that isn't very important to you, that's a compromise. If you concede because you'd rather give up what you want than lose him, that's settling. Compromising is dating a man shorter or heavier than what you thought you wanted (i.e. Charlotte and Hairy Harry from SATC). Settling is giving up a career you love because your man who is dead set against you working.
Women start to lose ground when they give up the things that they really want because they so desperately want to be married or because they don't think a man as good as this one will ever come around again. When you give up so much that you are giving up who you really are, you are settling. That is how relationships last for fifteen years that really shouldn't have become relationships to begin with.
The best way to avoid settling is to decide which issues are deal-breakers for you. Kids or family structure or something like that.
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