Quote:
Originally posted by honeychile
As someone who has talked to two different pastors for counseling on this very topic in the past week, my feeling is that:
When you are willing and do give 100% to your relationship, putting that person in the front of whatever your plans may be
AND
When that person ALSO is willing and does give 100% to your relationship, putting you in front of whatever plans are made.
Marriage isn't 50/50% - it's 100/100% There's a lot of sacrifice involved, but it has to be made by both partners, not just one. It's when you start to think as "we" and "our" and forget about "me" and "mine".
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That's probably why I'm not ready to get married yet. I don't want to sound selfish, but there have been relationships in my past that I gave more and them less, and I wound up putting things I valued and hoped for on hold.
It's all about compromise in my opinion. I don't believe anything is ever 100%/100%. No one can get along and come to a conclusion that benefits both all the time. It's a matter of making concessions and knowing the limits of the relationship.
But marriage is a whole different story
P.S. I TOTALLY believe in pre-marriage counseling with a religious figure! I think that is EXTREAMLY important and from what I've heard it puts EVERYTHING out on the table. Lets face it, there are certain issues couples don't always think of until it's too late.