[AlphaSigOU]

Uh oh... I better get ready to spout off my pledge mod knowledge for the next beat down in the Mod Corner!

(stolen from Bugle Notes, the U.S. Military Academy's plebe (4th class/freshman) knowledge book.)

"How's the cow?"

"Sir/Ma'm, she walks, she talks, she's full of chalk, the lacteal fluid extracted from the female of the bovine species is highly prolific to the 2003rd degree, and that's the how of the cow, sir/ma'm!"

What do Plebes rank?

"Sir/Ma'm, plebes rank above the Superintendent's dog, the Commandant's cat, the waiters in the Mess Hall, the Hell Cats [the cadets who sound the bugle calls), the Generals in the Air Force, and all the Admirals in the whole damned Navy, sir/ma'm!"

"What are the three rules of thumb?"

"Sir/M'am, the three rules of thumb are as follows:

1. "Does this action attempt to deceive anyone or allow anyone to be deceived?

2. "Does this action gain or allow the gain of a privilege or advantage to which I or someone else would not otherwise be entitled?

3. "Would I be satisfied by the outcome if I were on the receving end of this action?"