HC I'm blue today
HC its hard to be blue when you're not really allowed
HC I don't bring my actual personality or mental state to work
HC I just try to be nice and helpful
HC today I don't really feel like it
HC I can still do "cheery", but more in an "automatic" kinda way than with anything real behind it
HC I turned 24 this week
HC I don't feel old or anything, just kinda sad about it
HC I read Power of One
HC identifying with the character GREATLY
HC I am tired of the whole hiding thing- it's always either be the nonentity, or excel at everything so no one questions you
HC it's like a combo of both at work
HC I cultivate a can-handle-anything kinda image
HC I also don't talk about anything particularly personal, just chatter about things that don't matter much
HC I told like 2 folks in the office it was my bday (my office knew though, and took me out which was really nice. I like my coworkers sooo much)
HC I told like two other people after the fact and they're like "why didn't you tell anyone?"
HC it just didn't occurr to me to tell anyone- I didnt want to be a big deal
HC longtime habit
HC I realised after finishing Power of One that it's really just another way of holding yourself away from people around you
HC not necessarily a bad thing- you never get too involved, or hurt
HC you never really get close either
HC *sigh*
HC I'm going before I choke on my own semi-melodramatic self-pity