Adrienne,
Thank you for sharing your story with us.
I scarcely know what to say. You've been through a lot in your pursuit of AI. Maybe the best thing for you to do is take a step back and regroup. Don't close the door entirely! There are still 22 more NPC groups out there (well, 21 since AEPhi doesn't do AI), or maybe a non-NPC group is right for you.
Take care. 
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AEΦ ... Multa Corda, Una Causa ... Celebrating Over 100 Years of Sisterhood
Have no place I can be since I found Serenity, but you can't take the sky from me...
Only those who risk going too far, find out how far they can go.
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