[Maroon5grl]

Yesterday was Philanthropy Day and I am already conflicted. I was invited back to 5 houses and decided my choice is basically between Alice and Ariel.

Ariel, again I just love this house because every time I'm there about four or five girls come over and absolutely bombard me with hugs and wish me good luck and ask about my day and genuinely CARE about my answers to their questions! There was no forced conversation here, and they are all SO hilarious. I could fit in with them quite easily I think, and I already know which girl I would want for my big sis if I joined this sorority! I talked to them not only about sorority things but also about life things, about classes and my boyfriend issues and found that they had been in similar situations and were totally willing to help me out. What I thought was the sweetest thing was that some of the girls made plans to hang out with me like, a week or two from now, meaning that no matter what house (if any) I end up in, they still wanted to be friends and that means a lot.

I was SO surprised and sort of honored when Alice invited me back, because these girls are all so beautiful and so intelligent, and I was so surprised that they would even consider me, but they did and I am SO glad because I felt REALLY comfortable there last night. It was my last party, and I went in feeling very tired and emotionally drained (I only ate once yesterday, which was a stupid thing to do!!!), but when I left their house, I felt oddly energized and happy for no particular reason! I was so surprised at how much 45 min of just chilling with these girls turned my whole mood around. And it really didn't feel job-interview-y here...it felt like I was just hanging out with friends. Not only do I feel comfortable here, but there are also so many girls that I look up to and admire so much.

After that, there's Jasmine and Cinderella, and I really like the girls here but can't see myself so much being a part of them. So yesterday's rankings looked like:

1. Alice
1. Ariel
2. Jasmine
3. Cinderella
4. Lilo
5. Snow White
6. Sleeping Beauty
7. Belle

I could NOT sleep last night because I am so nervous about Alice and Ariel inviting me back tomorrow (when we visit up to 2 houses.) Honestly...if both organizations don't invite me back I don't think I will continue with rush. I really want to join a group that is special in my heart rather than choose any group that takes me for the sake of being in the Greek system. Well, what do you guys think about that? Some advice would be great....Although, I guess that's a personal decision for each woman to make on her own in the end. I'm hoping Pref night will make this easier. Everyone has been telling me that it was the 2nd day or Pref night that made the decision for them.

Thank you so much for the encouragement, I'm so nervous I really need it right now!!!!!