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I think ritual dress for conclaves has always been more strict than at individual chapters...I went out and bought closed-toe shoes to go to LTS this summer, only to see that even Natl personnel were wearing open toed...
It is an individual choice. If you are dressed professionally and not like you're going clubbing than it should be fine. I definitely would bring up the issue you have...for me it's the complete opposite, i'm really fair and a lot of nylons are too dark for me or at least I find they are - so I do end up spending $8 on ones that actually are "nude".
My chapter has become a bit more lenient in the past few years, open toed is allowed now, and nylons aren't necessary for ritual meetings, although I think they are for other rituals (pref, pinning, initiation)...oh yeah, def a must at initiation....
on another note, i do wear my pin when i wear "business casual"...basically if it's not denim, sportswear or clubwear i'll wear my pin - i don't do that too often though since I usually wear other phi sig jewelry.
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