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It sounds to me this guy is a decent human being. Which I think is really really hard to find. I also think it sounds like he is having some internal turnoil that he needs to figure out himself. No one, not even you can help him figure it out. He needs to figure it out on his own.
My advice is to give him space but still be his friend IF you want to be his friend. Have clear and concise boundaries of what you are willing to put up with, etc and what you are not. Be careful to NOT set a prescedent of allowing him to take a step just this one time if you think just this one time will be a regular thing (I hope that makes sense).
And, most importantly, live your life. If that means dating another guy, if you meet someone you like, go out with him. DO NOT stop and wait around for this guy.
It really sounds like it's not meant to be right now and you can not put your life on hold to figure it out. He said he's not ready, so he's not ready. period. His actions, his best friend etc may tell you the opposite but hes telling you he's not ready so he's not ready.
INMO, in the beginning relationships should be all about fun and easy breazy stuff and you are having the exact opposite so right now you need to find someone who is emotionally ready to be with you the way you want to be with. It's ok if he's not ready, still feels guilt about his ex, that's fine but you need to take care of you.
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