Quote:
Originally posted by thesweetestone
I think the Bride and Groom should pay for the dresses if there is a wedding or not. I personally am not going to pay to be in any one's wedding. In this situation it would be totally rude for the bride and groom not to pay for the dresses. If the wedding party was nice enough to help you'll out by offering to pay for the dresses in the first place why wouldn't you now pay for the dresses. It doesn't matter why there is not going to be a wedding.
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As someone who is getting married in 4 weeks, I felt the urge to speak up.
It is the obligation of the bridesmaids/groomsmen to pay for their own attire if they are participating in a wedding. There are times when a bride or groom may offer to pay all or part of the expense as part of their gift to the wedding party; this, however, is definitely not a requirement. Trust me, the bride and groom have got enough things to pay for as it is. (The average wedding costs around $20,000 these days.)
If someone cannot afford to buy a dress/shoes/etc in order to be in the wedding party, then they always have the option of turning down the request and choosing to be a guest rather than a participant. To me, being asked to participate in a wedding is an honor, and I have never thought of it as paying to participate when I stood up with my sorority sisters over the years. I considered the purchase of my attire to be part of my gift to the couple getting married.
In the instance of a bride calling off the wedding... I don't know the proper etiquette for this particular instance. However, I personally would pay my bridesmaids for the dresses if they couldn't be returned. But, if I was a bridesmaid, I probably wouldn't ask the bride to do so -- I'd accept if she offered, but wouldn't bring it up on my own. Calling off a wedding is a traumatic thing, and I wouldn't want to add to her stress.