I have never been interested in thugs. I have always liked confident men, which is not the equivalent of a thug. I have always liked men who were clear about the value of the relationship and treated it as such. I also like men who are flexible enough to know when male assertiveness is appropriate (sometimes) and when it is not (most of the time) and when it is time to be kind and patient (most of the time).
When I was younger, I also used also say I didn't want a "doormat" so he wouldn't get run over. What I have since realized is that there are VERY FEW men who will let you do just any old thing to them. Whether they say something about it immediately or not, they will let you know, by word or by action eventually, that your isht will not be tolerated. Now, I LOVE those guys who let me slide with stuff rather than riding me all the time: it creates peace and in no way diminishes my respect for them.
|