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I am going to say it.
A few months ago, I thought I was pregnant. I had a really, really bad scare, to the point where everything gave me the idea that I was, but the tests were negative, and finally my lil friend came to visit. What a relief that was. I've never cried so much in my life than I did then. Why? Because I knew that I am not responsible enough, or at all, to take care of a child. Not to mention the guy who could have been the father is a total piece of white trash, who has a kid and rarely sees him or takes care of him. That may be against his will because the mother won't let him, but I would still never trust him with my child. Also, I am from a very strict family. Me getting pregnant would mean me getting kicked out of my house, fired from my job, no car, no school. And my father would also probably have a heart attack, seriously.
The question is would I have had an abortion? I'm not going to lie. I would have. I shouldn't have had sex with him, but we always were very careful and that was our only mistake. We were ALOT more careful afterwards.
Am I a horrible person for wanting to? I don't think I was being selfish in the matter. I was thinking about the possible child, the could have been father, and my family. If none of these were issues I would have just gone on with the pregnancy and raised the child.
I look at my niece and think, OMG could I really do this? And I feel terrible. I still cry thinking about what could have happened.[/color]
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