[DG515]

Hey everyone,
For most of you, you know that I went away to work at Girl Scout Camp all summer, well, I'm back! :-) I'll have another post with some of the highlights, if you so desire (some of the girls were WAY too cute) but that's not the focus of this post, sadly enough.
I wrote a letter to one of my sisters (one of the few I actually talk to, that pretty well describes what I'm thinking, so i'll just post that here...)
Hey B
So I don't have a lot of time to chit chat, as you don't have much time to read my ramblings, but pretty much, the rest of what I was saying yesterday was that I'm tired of working my ass off and not getting "paid" for it. I know, you don't get paid in money, and obvioiusly, I don't expect that, but I'm talking in other realms. Half the girls in the chapter don't take time to be involved, even if they are supposed to be involved (aka, officers). When I was getting ready to leave to come here, I tried a number of different times to get some people to come hang out before I left and what happened?? Yeah, that's right, I hung out with the same 5 or 6 people that I always do. When I make a list of my close friends, at this point in my life, there are only maybe 4 Dg's on said list. 3. And that fact is expanded on by the fact that none of them are DG's anymore (or at least active). Becca moved away, Nikki's moving away, you're leaving, and Jen Stair has left as well. As of this moment, there's no one really left that I click with, or really, even talk to, ya know? The facts continue with the fact that I've kept in almost constant contact with just 2 people this summer. Nikki S and Don. Any of them my sisters? No. You know, the people that are supposed to be by you all your life, due to the sacred bonds of sisterhood, yeah, when you leave the state, for most of them, it's out of sight out of mind. I've been sending out these blanket emails all summer, letting people know what I'm up to, and you know who's responded? Thats right, maybe 1 sister, the rest are all other friends of mine. And I know, some situations are different than others, for example, I'm fully aware of your crap-computer :-) *I smile as I recall the nights we tried to talk online ;-) * and that you work all the time :-D and I know that there are others like you, but still, it's kind of ridiculous. And, I just now hear about Nikki going to Chicago?? And to find out from someone besides her.....::rolls her eyes:: When I read my email from Melissa saying that the table at SOAR was gone, due to lack of attendance, it pissed me off. It pissed me off in a severe way. We have 30 people in our chapter and we still had that problem? Where was Kristin with her emails reminding people they needed to be there? I mean, as Panhel person, she should be involved in that. Where was a reminder email from Melissa? As president, she should have been a little more active in her participation. Granted, we are all big girls, and I'm not excusing any of us from our responcibilities (even I'm at fault in a way, just taking off an leaving all summer) but their job responcibilities indicate some bonus responcibilities. HOw come Mel didn't know about the lack of attendance until it was too late? Shouldn't she, as president be concerned with our participation in the SOARs? I'm curious as to how many of her sessions she was at, and whether she went or not at all. These recruitment preps, I never get any reminder emails now. Are they just not coming anymore or am I not getting them because of being out of town? I spent my birthday dinner with my parents and Nikki S. I wasn't going to send out these mass emails begging people to come and hang out with me at dinner. I figured the people that cared enough to want to be there, would be there and they were. I've had more fun and more good times and more sincere times with the people I've worked with all summer than I have with the people I've called my sisters for almost a year now. When I left Ft. Wayne to come down here, I was sad for a mere handful of people. Don't get me wrong, I missed a lot more, but I was only honestly sad about a handful of people. And that was the people I see every day, or almost everyday, being as the fact that they would be the ones that my routine would be upset by not having there. When I leave here, you can be sure that I'll be crying for at least 2 days straight. I'm sadder about leaving here and going home to my FRIENDS and my FAMILY and my SISTERS than i was about leaving them to go to a place filled with strangers. Somethings wrong with that.
LITB
Boo T

Well, I can expand upon if you wish, but it's pretty much all there. I just don't know what I should do. Every one of my sisters I was close with is now officially gone. The rest of them, I never really talk to or hang out with (we are a commuter campus and don't have a house). The whole chapter seems, at least to me, to be falling apart around me. If I stay, I know I'll be one of the few people that actually work, and so I'll be trying to save a struggling chapter, working at my job (whatever that may be, i'm looking for a new one now), trying to pull my grades up, trying to do extra-cirricular activities that actually go towards my future *ie, newspaper and theater*. I feel like the way things are now, my chapter isn't supportive of me, or anyone, in the sense of making us better people and enriching our lives. It's turning into a second (and for some of us, a third) job that costs us money. I just don't know what to do. We had a Sigma Kappa and a Kappa Delta that I worked with all summer and I would talk to them about how I was feeling and that helped a little bit, but I love you guys and you've know me longer and you, obviously, know DG more....Any help at all would be appreciated. Sorry this is so long :-(
LITB
Mandie
aka, Boo T