If she were a true friend then she wouldnt even consider your "ex" as potential. As for the "ex," he should know better than to provoke one of your best buds. In my opinion, they are both in the wrong and you should move on..without him and find a better friend if things get ugly. You obvisouly didnt keep him around for a reason and keep it that way weather or not your friend is with him or not. Ditch 'em both if they keep up these hurtful tactics.